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Chess Tattoo

In a local shopping centre the other day I saw a rather large girl in a low-cut dress. She had a treble clef and a couple of quavers tattooed on her breast. She had good skin tone and colour, and in spite of her weight the tattoo was attractive—but I couldn't help wondering what it would look like if she kept eating. Would those few notes expand into a full length symphony?

Tattoos appear to be in vogue at present and while some look great, others do not. Sometimes I wonder if tattoos are the result of graffiti vandals turning their own bodies into a living canvas.

The guy in the photograph does appear to have been a little too enthusiastic but he'd be handy to have around if you needed a chess board to explain your latest brilliancy to a friend.

In spite of such permanent disfigurement, support for tattoos sometimes comes from the unlikeliest places. It was no less a personage than Major Charles Emerson Winchester III who said, “Tattoos are the common man's way of investing in art.” (OK, scriptwriter Burt Prelutsky penned the thought but it was Charles who voiced it.)

We've all noticed that chess is used in the movies to give the impression that one character or another is smarter than the average bear and, if that's the public conception we might consider getting a chess tattoo to show that we're pretty smart ourselves. Even if we're not!

What image would you choose? The knight has a lot of panache and is a universal favourite, but that's already been done to death. What about a beautiful chess player like Kateryna Lahno or Alexandra Kosteniuk? That's a bit sexist, and unless you're planning to have a mini-biography penned alongside the face, there wouldn't be much point.

Then what about a winning position from one of our games? It couldn't be too complex or we'd end up looking like the guy with the chequered head. My favourite memory would be a game I won under tournament conditions last year against a WIM. I stuffed the score sheet but the final position was very much like this:

But it wasn't much of a finish. Black's flag fell while she was wondering how to stop me sacrificing the exchange. Was it a game to be proud of? Not really. With 600 rating points between us she assumed she only had to push the pieces around to win and took me a little too casually. I didn't win—she lost. OK, scrap that idea.

So, after much deliberation, I've decided that there's a way to get a chess tattoo that is not only free, but has the potential to make money. I'm going to get Erik to sponsor me for a chess.com logo—complete with green pawn—and then I'll ask for a commission for anybody I sign up because of it.

On the other hand, I may just wear my chess.com T-shirt.

Comments


  • 5 years ago

    Dozy

    Hi GreenLaser. Some years ago I had "Wake up with me every morning" printed on a T-shirt.  The guy I bought it from thought it had sexual overtones till I asked for the other side to be printed, "AIR-FM Breakfast Show 101.7".

    "The final or key position in a chess game is suitable for a tee shirt. A last round game victory resulting in a tournament win is best. It could say XYZ Club Championship, date, players, white/black to move, etc." I can think of at least one person who'd love this idea.  A couple of years ago one of our Sydney juniors mooted the idea of having your chess rating printed on a t-shirt.  Maybe it would have suited him while his rating was on the rise, but he might  have been less enthusiastic when it began to fall?

    I like your idea better.  Chess positions -- printed on the front, of course!  What a wonderful excuse for contemplating the rises and falls of chess players of the fairer persuasion.

  • 5 years ago

    NM GreenLaser

    The final or key position in a chess game is suitable for a tee shirt. A last round game victory resulting in a tournament win is best. It could say XYZ Club Championship, date, players, white/black to move, etc. Perhaps chess.com could take orders for these. The future of tatoos could be enhanced by security needs. Everyone would have shaved heads with UPC codes tattoed on top in order to be scanned in dooways.

  • 5 years ago

    Dozy

    Ah, but it's lovely to get comments on a post.  Tickles the ego no end. Of course, there wasn't much to say about this one. 

    I share Phil's allergy to pain.  In Oz there's a trend for our football stars to cover themselves in tattoos that can't have been pleasant to get.  Still, you've gotta be tough to play footy, so maybe they're just making a statement.

    Uritbon obviously has a very devious mind (camouflage! one hand on the board and he won't notice his missing bishop...)  No wonder he plays chess!  I think I'd like this guy.

    Danielsun said, from an artist's/chess player's point of view,i think it's a wonderful option.the ability to express your passion for the chess "lifestyle."   Be careful not to close your mouth too quickly while your tongue is still in that cheek, Daniel.  It could be as painful as a tattoo.  It's not generally known but I once invented a completely new art form.  It's called Cheryllian Schematics.

    And cat-of-chess wasn't in favour at all:  Tattoos are bad for you and Tattoos are  ugly. You may not know this, c-o-c but in Australia blood transfusions are free and the donors receive nothing more than a cup of coffee and a couple of biscuits.  However, the blood banks will not accept blood from any donor who has been tattooed in the previous six months.  Some people think this is because the needles may carry heptatis but the real reason (as we initiates are aware) is that the tattoo may be transferred with the blood and might show up on the recipient.  Imagine the embarrassment one of the afore-mentioned footy players would suffer if Radar O'Reilly's teddy bear suddenly appeared on his cheek!

    Erik, of whom I thought better, has shown himself to be short sighted and unimaginative.  His "stick with the shirt :D" can be seen as a sad prophecy about the future of this site.  Shame on you Erik!

    But the most appropriate of all the comments here was probably the first one posted.  It was from Masud whose insightful remark summed up the true worth of this post.  He just said, "Hmm".

  • 5 years ago

    erik

    stick with the shirt :D

  • 5 years ago

    cat_of_chess

    Tattoos are bad for you and Tattoos are  ugly

  • 5 years ago

    danielsun

    from an artist's/chess player's point of view,i think it's a wonderful option.the ability to express your passion for the chess "lifestyle." 

  • 5 years ago

    uritbon

    camouflage! one hand on the board and he won't notice his missing bishop...

  • 5 years ago

    Phil_from_Blayney

    LOL Good one Dave. I would consider the idea of a tattoo except for my allergy to pain Laughing

  • 5 years ago

    emiab

    lolz to " if found wandering kind return this man to his home address". gotta love your humour Laughing. I would do so, but only after playing a game of chess face to face with you Tongue out

  • 5 years ago

    Dozy

    Me too, emi.  I gotta confess my hairstyle is pretty much the same as the guy with the tattoo (egg shell blond) but my body remains unadorned.  If I was gunna get a tattoo it would probably be a couple of lines of text that said, "If found wandering, kindly return this man to his home address."

  • 5 years ago

    emiab

    Nice post David, quite interesting analogy . And the commission idea is great ! You already do a lot for this site  by writing wonderful articles , well documented and with historical facts. 

    I must say I never understood the desire to pose tatoos . It seems such a cruel act to do to your own body.

  • 5 years ago

    Masud

    hmm

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