There are lots of reasons people may not greet. Some are mentioned here such as using a device that doesn't even show a chat box. I think the default shows the moves box, so one has to click on chat to see if anything was said, when in a lot of games all at once, even just doing that can be a bit of a chore :) They might already be chatting with a friend or participating in several groups and or forums. So its not always that people are being rude a bit thoughtless maybe though lol. Sometimes people feel in a chatty mood, other times they may just be tired, want to realx and play a few games before a snooze or sleep. Sometimes even I play a friend and the conversation doesn't go much beyond hi, how are you? When I am tired I barely want to speak anything whatsoever and just enjoy the game. I think many people are the same way.

Something strange happened to me recently. I played this man a game for the first time and we both said hello. After an exchange of messages, I found out that he and I are from the same state..and also his wife is from the state I now live in. We played our game and everything was fine. He challenged me to a new game, which we are in right now...and he disabled chat after I said one thing! I sent him a message to apologize if I said anything wrong, and I've not heard from him...but I think it's rude to disable chat in a situation like this...but if I've never had any chat or message from a person, I don't mind.

Mostly, I enjoy an exchange of words with other players and because of that, I have definitely made real friends with people who I have never met in person.  I am unlikely to have that good fortune, but if such happened, then it would be a meeting of real friends.

There are some very good people in the world, India, U.K. U.S.A. JAPAN.CANADA. SOUTH AFRICA.  NEDERLANDS. RUSSIA.  You name it, nice people live there.  Long may that last.   Derrick.

..

~ there is, a saying: .." ...good-manners cost little .."

i'm sure  it could be "applied," in this-case!

I try to make a contact, like "Good luck Bill" or "Welcome my name is Derek" or just hello. It makes me mad that they can not be bothered to reply. I do not want to have a big conversation, I find it is just good manners to Break the Ice. Otherwise it is just like playing a computer. If the conversation grows it is up to the two players concerned to enlarge or cut out the chat.

DEREK.

I have said hello to some, and they have not responded,in which case will finish the game and go on to the next person.If some one would greet me with a hello,then I would respond,then if a conversation is started then I may or may not continue answering.But if not,then will politely say that I do not wish to chat, as my mother did teach my sibling and my sef manners.

mrcheckmate,

I'm very sorry for your lack of reading comprehension. For the third time, I said I prefer not talking to strangers while playing chess with them. It's interesting how snide and sarcastic you can be, all the while bemoaning how rude people are?

To spaceoddity: I did not know that.  Thx for sharing. Since I don't play mobile I never thought about that.

For you yoshtodd AGAIN,

       I read EXACTLY what you said,and stand by my  first response directed back at you.Secondly , it seems like you need to say what you mean and or mean what you say.........Furthermore it sounds like I've "hit a chord" with you or you wouldn't be so upset.

       Personally speaking,Ithink your'e confused yoshtodd ! I don't understand you corresponding back and forth with me, when you stated earlier that you didn't like chatting with people you didn't know......HELLO ! You have now said enough to me,(A PERFECT STRANGER),To have qualified you for the"Chit-Chat Award of the Year".Congratulations you've now just passed the "GREETING STAGE" into the "Casual conversationalist Stage" WELL DONE !

mrcheckmate,

How about you read what I say before responding? I never said I play only people I know; I said I only chat during the game if I know the person. If you do exchange greetings, a talkative person might then follow up with "how are you?" or something other, which I feel even more rude not responding to, so it's easier to just not say hello in the first place (or turn of chat). Some times I do choose to talk if I'm in the mood, but if not, I don't think it is that rude. But whatever, I'll leave you to complain and moan about it.

this is true.

I mostly play on my iPhone where i'm not alerted to new messages.  this is a problem and should be fixed so that i can see if i have messages from my opponent on the chess board display.  actually checking to see if i have messages, before every move, for every opponent, would be incredibly time-consuming. 

I had an opponent say 'hi' to me at the beginning of a game.  i didn't notice until about move 6, after she quit the game and insulted me for being 'rude'. (how ironic)

For you yoshtodd,

             First of all,we're not talking about "Chit-Chatting" or Talking during a game/Match.

            Secondly;You cannot pretend to tell me you ONLY play chess with people you Know.

           Thirdly(And the Point,I might add is) can't you simply GREET someone BEFORE the game/Match begins. You know. it goes SOMETHING LIKE THIS: Hello my name is so and so ! IS THIS REALLY TO MUCH TO ASK OF ANYONE OUT THERE IN CHESSLAND ?

Maybe they just want to play the game and not chit chat? There are plenty of other places to go to engage in conversation (even the forum here). Personally I just like to play and not talk if it's someone I don't know. Over the years I've had many people make rude taunts and comments during the game and it makes it hard to play. I'd rather talk on the forum or via messages, instead of during the game.

Hello RootsRocker,THANKS FOR AGREEING WITH MY POINT OF VIEW.........If animals can "Great each other" AND communicate to each other,WHY DON'T WE ?

Hi Mrcheckmate, I don't like your argument about animals.  Technically, i.e. biologically, we are animals and I think that you'll find many (if not most) species  of animal greet each other using their preferred means of communication.  Imagine a world where creatures didn't greet each other - the populations would shrink pretty fast!

Well said Mrcheckmate.  You're right.  There is no excuse for not at least introducing yourself.  It's not a generational thing, because through chat - I've made several friends from 12 years old to 86 years old.  So I guess it's more of 'lack of social skills' that we're looking at.

I've played over 500 games with people from all over the world, and while some of the english is less that great- everyone who has chatted back - chats in english and we've been able to share our languages with each other.  Ive learned about various cultures and countries, and that's pretty awesome.

Oh well, just wanted to vent originally.  Just like walking down the street, here at chess.com - you can meet nice people and you can meet anti-social people.  I'm thankful for the friendships I've made here and look forward to more.

For those of you who choose not to chat and those of you who go one step further and disable your chat box, that's your choice - I just think you're missing out on a lot of wonderful experiences you could have with people from around the world.

I believe in greetings at the beginning of a match.  I like to know the first name of the opponent and not just get a "gg" after playing a long game.

Internet playing is cold enough without adding coldness of not even speaking plesentries to each other, or introducing ourselves to each other.

I disagree with anyone not being able to simply give a greeting at the beginning of any match.  The reason I disagree is that I feel language is no barrier when it comes to a simple greeting. 

Women and men play golf, tennis, checkers, polo, etc. etc., all of them with different languages, so-called "gentlemens games" and I consider chess to be no different. 

Heck, even the violent-physical sports have greetings - the UFL and UFC shake hands before fights, in football (english/american) team leaders greet each other before the game starts.  I could go on and on about a plethera of sports and games - none of which ignore their opponents at the beginning or during their play.

We are playing  a so-called 'gentlemans game' here.  And I believe that we not only should be, but it IS A MUST that we run in the forefront of the cattleheard - not in THE DRAG - eating dust and following the heard of cattle.

A higher power put us in dominion over animals, we (chess players) are not animals.  And I believe that a simple greeting transends all languages and knows no barriers. So Let's start greeting one another BEFORE every game/Match. {:>)

Well said Interrobang- and I agree RootsRocker. I wish there would be a qualifier before you start a game with someone that says "yes I chat" or "I don't chat" - I would stay away from those who choose not to chat.

Get used to it.  You're not the first person to complain opponents not being courteous, and you won't be the last.  The fact of the matter is that anyone who fails to greet you in return does so for the same reason that you greeted them in the first place: it's their choice.  Now, those of us who enjoy greeting (chatting!) with opponents know that plenty of people out there will extend the simple courtesy of a polite greeting.  But as long as you play games against anyone you don't know, anyone from different cultures across the globe, anyone whose English is less than perfect, or anyone of a different age, you will run the risk of playing someone who might have a different idea about decorum than you do.  The fact is that you will get this kind of reaction from some people, and I would urge you to try your best to reserve judgment.

If, on the other hand, one of your opponents says anything that's actually unambiguously hostile to you, you have my full permission to channel your indignation into your pieces and kick their butt. ;-)