1.When someone asks you "What is 5x9?" You say that it is 5 queens.

2.You have played over 1000 games on chess.com.

3. You are constanly watching your online games in case somebody moved on them

4. You see a castle and you call it a rook

5. You call horses knights

6. When you are playing a strategy game, you think that you can only move 1 unit at a time

7. You find it easy to come up with signs that you play chess too much

8. You know from experience that knights and bishops are worth exactly the same

when you dream about chess....

Can everybody number their signs, please?

10. when you start talking about chess after you've had some alcohol

11. you go through your games in your head when you're not playing and try to find better moves

Actually this statement is false. Some people reguard the bishop as 3.5 and the knight as 3, and in most situations a bishop is slighty preferable, but it always depends on the position. 

12.when you forget to go to work/ turn in your homework because you were up all night(KNIGHT!) playing chess.

13.  You jump at a restaurant when the waiter says, "Check."

14.  You bump into someone or something and say J’adoube.

15.  You have more chess clocks than watches.

16. You have more PGN than DOC files on your computer.

17.  You meet someone and your first question is, “What’s your rating?”

18. You take a chess set and book to the bathroom.

19.  You have more chess books than any other book or magazine combined.

20. You go to any Barnes and Noble in the world and know exactly where all the chess books are located.

21.  You know that mate, mating positions, exposed bishops, and forking the queen have nothing to do with sex.

22. The first thing you do is setup chessboard instead of making the coffee in the morning.

23.  You spot the chessboard set up wrong in every movie with a chess scene.

24. You stay up until 4 AM playing on chess.com

25. You are sitting waiting for finals to be over and a Novelty in the KG pops into your head with a plausable mainline.

26. You are playing Guitar and instead of Ab (A flat) you accidentally say e4 (E string 4th fret)

27. You watch a game between two amatures, and get excited when they see the same move you do.

28. you forget that there are two people playing the game and go on to explain to the people watching the winning combination.

29. Your most used game on the computer is chess titans which you use to practice pattern recognition

30. You accidentally eat a Bishop

oh and all of those have happened to me in my post.

31. You download a MP3 file of the Live chess sounds.

32. When you skip school you spend time on chess.com instead of COD

COD (call of duty right [too bad they killed Soap])

33. Your most visited web site is a chess site/server.

34. your wife gets angry because you play so much, but you think she is just jealous you are enjoying yourself so much

35. if you could, you play chess every free moment you had

36. when you think using your free time doing other things while monitoring your moves on Chess.com is really fruitful each day

37. you play every free moment you have and it doesn't feel like its enough

38. you find yourself arguing chess theory with others frequently

39. you find yourself at work thinking about chess and wish you were either playing or on chess.com

40. you pull out your cell phone evertime you go to the john and play a few moves on your saved game

41. you frequently have your engine give you a list of the best moves for each successive variation for an opening to study

42. you completely ignore all of your friends in passing on the way to and from class because you're too busy calculating in your head whether or not your N sac earlier today was sound

43. you know what a N sac is

44. you can't sleep because you know your chess book was shipped in today and you're picking it up tomorrow morning (a local college had both of Euwe's "The Middle Game in Chess" books in algebraic, and they shipped them over to my school's library yesterday for free... and yes I slept quite  poorly last night)