You think a desperado is a chessplayer wearing a bandoleer, poncho, and a sombrero.

634. You think a sack is something to carry somethings

635. You think a fork is a utensil

636. You think a X-ray is to look at bones

637. you think that kings is the strongest peice in chess

638. you think that pawns can only promote into bishops

639. you think pawns are to weak to give checks

640. Your mom is gay.

Maybe.  I think backward pawns are connect to another pawn, though.  Wikipedia gives this:  "In chess, a backward pawn is a pawn that is behind the pawns of the same color on the adjacent files and that cannot be advanced without loss of material, usually the backward pawn itself."

You yell "touchdown!" and add six points to your scoresheet when you reach the 8th rank with your pawn.

642. You promote your pawns into hot succubi and then they proceed to seduce the opponent. He/she then becomes distracted while you take his pieces off the board. =)

I already said 626!

We really should stop with the Fool's Mate! There have been several posts with the Fool's Mate!

chessgm8, do you really expect the people who come here to post to read all the (26) pages to make sure that they do not repeat what was said? I don't think so.

643. You try to promote a pawn to a pawn

644. You lose to this: 

645. You play this:

646. You don't feel like playing, so do this:

This is your favorite opening

647. You're a coneheadzombie and you post fantastic wins

648. You think that's a fantastic win.

649. This is the only game you have won:

650. When you challenge the computer to a lightning 1/0 game

651.your just too dumb