Erik asked me to post this for him... so here we go!

Here is the next Picture Caption Contest.

Rules: Maximum 3 entries per person, and they must all be in the same post! Create a caption for the picture below. You should specify who is making the statement.

Prize: 1 month of free Chess Mentor

Judgement Criteria: How hard it makes Erik laugh. :)

Final Submission Date: A winner will be declared on September 20th.

Chess is a team sport

1.

Kid on the right: "Un-mateable..."

2.

Guy, back left:  "Patzers! 1.a3?? What are they doing!"

3.

Players:  "J'adoube."

The day chess ceased to be a winter sport...

Perhaps it was fate their eyes met off the reflection of a giant pawn.

"I know I have to move the piece I touched, but the darn thing was about to fall over!!!"

The chess game scene from the uncut version of 'Honey I Shrunk The Kids'.

Would be buyers examine Keith richards' shot glass set.

Woman: 'I don't think it was worth the extra for the triple-weighted pieces.'

1. "When curling meets chess: He only meant to go 1. e3 but they couldn't stop it enough so it went e4."
2. "Okay I took your pawn. But how the heck am I supposed to move this thing?"
3. "Uh-oh. The pawn got to the back row. But we don't have any more ice queens!"

Redhead:  "We just iced this win."

(for Harry Potter fans only)   Ron to Hermione:  "Is this what muggle chess is like?" 

1. boy: "so... do you come here often?"

2. a man passing by: "can't they move faster?"

another jerk: "no. they can't."

3. me: "i guess i just haven't got anything else to say..."

1. Don't fall on your glass, mate.

2.  You've been pawned!

3.  "I don't think this Avon perfume bottle opens."

1. But i wanted to play white !!

2. its called en passant and i'm having that pawn !!

"I told you not to enter the blitz chess competition!"

1 Redhead Guy (out loud): "Boy, do I have a BIG pawn for her!"

2 Redhead Guy: "Hey, girl! Help me move this heavy thing!" Girl: "This thing weighs 5 pounds..."

3 Girl (thinking): "Why is this creep staring at my 'pawns'?"

Results of Brain Regeneration Techniques on Curlers
by Brian Wallace

2008/08/19

         Scientists at the Canadian Institute of Neuroscience concluded a study today involving attempts to recover some of the normal brain functioning in people afflicted with a debilitating disease that causes them to enjoy a primitive passtime sufferers refer to as "Curling".
         Dr. Martin Cruthers who spearheaded the joint venture on behalf of the Canadian Department of Health Research explains:
        "We've found that people with this degenerative neurological disease compulsively engage in the aberrant behavior of sliding what they refer to as a rock whose path they clear with a sweeper. This degeneracy is clearly so absurd as that it would be veritably comedic, if it did not ruin the lives of so many people."
       With a nationwide funding drive on behalf of the Find a Cure For Curling Foundation of Canada, enough money was raised for research into  regenerative techniques to replace those damaged areas of the brain that result in curling.
         "What we found as we begun the procedure was an almost immediate increase in the curler's intelligence quotient. They began performing better in almost every way intelligence is normally assessed, be it spacial reasoning or cognitive ability to recognise what constitutes a real game. What the study group was really astounded to see was that the curlers began to find ways of transforming their affliction through intermediate substitutes, one of which you can see pictured above," Cruthers adds.
        "We found that with effective treatment, the curling sufferers were able to move from a brain damaged state of enjoying almost neanderthal-like games with large rocks to the high-functioning, healthy activity of playing chess instead. Success was such that, in the best cases, some of the recoveree's began to play and study chess almost every waking hour that they were not otherwise obligated to sleep or seek sustenance."
        Families of those who currently have a spouse or sibling with the curling affliction remains in the thousands, and are instructed to ask their family physician about the availability of the cure in their area.
        Doctor Reece Thompson of the Canadian Psychiatric board has this advice for families who are urgent for treatment: "While waiting for a loved one to be cured of the scourge of curling, I recommend signing them up for a free account on chess.com and, while their initial comprehension will be no doubt limited by the extensive brain damage, try to sit with them and work through one of the daily puzzles that chess.com offers. We remain hopeful that those who are currently only intelligent enough as that they imagine sweeping a broom constitutes a game will be at least able to understand why e4 and d4 are logical opening moves insofar as that they control the center."
        Janice Kingson of Regina, whose father is a longtime sufferer of Curling feels that this development "represents the hope my family has been praying for all these years."
        "Since my father, Jack, has been recieving treatment, we've been finally able to put his past as a curler behind us. Whereas I used to stay up at night worrying about him, I now sleep soundly when I hear him wake up at 1 am to get in a few solid hours of Live chess. I guess my dream is that every family in our situation could finally feel the joy we felt when Jack purchased his gold membership."
        Diane Jennings of Toronto Ontario, in an interview with our coorespondant, said "My marriage to my husband Paul was on the verge of collapse! He used to steal off to the curling rink for days and ignore me entirely. Now, thanks to the treatment and all chess.com has to offer, Paul is able to ignore me from the comfort of our own home! He and I used to fight all the time about cleaning and bills, but since he's been taking out all of his agression in something he calls cheater_1 threads, we've enjoyed more togetherness than ever!"
        Further developments pending. Brian Wallace, CBC Canada, 2008.

Castling can be a real bitch sometimes.

"Oh no-no-no... you move the horse!"

Ice Ice Benko.... [dum-dum-dum-da-da-dum-dum]

ooops i just bumped the post

    1.   Many people suspected foul play on Jim's part when Stacy's pawn was about to take a bishop.

      Jim: "Oops, I accidentally toppled your pawn. *shove*, *smash*

check  check  check  check  check

1. From man in back row on left: "That's a rather transparent move..."

2. From one player to the other: "Keep moving the pawns until we've wore them out with forced moves!"

3. From one player to the other: "Why did we have to get the triple-weighted set?"

disclaimer: my previous "entry" isn't in the running for the contest, insofar as it wasn't a correct caption... this isn't either, I'm just having fun with it.

Caption 1

Boy : "Aw...I wish this is a crystal ball instead of a pawn"

Girl : "Hey, that's an idea. Let's go borrow Madame Zelga's crystal ball, cause I have no idea how to get out of the Marcozy bind the other team has put us into"

Caption 2

Boy : "This is good practice"

Girl : "For what ????"

Boy : "Lugging home the giant champagne bottle of Moet & Chandon we will win !"

Caption 3

Girl : "This is really dumb"

Boy : "Why ?"

Girl : "We have to pose like this, so that some desperate clown at www.chess.com comes up with a good caption just to win one month's free ChessMentor"

Boy : "Really sad - these people need to get a life"