I love a good pun. Gimme your favorite chess-related pun and maybe (you can hope) I'll die laughing. To start off, here are 2 from erik (yeah, that erik):

"Reti or not, here I come!"

"Come follow me and I will make you a Fischer of men..."

"Are u gonna take me?" - said the pawn actress to the Bishop

Give a man a Fisch and you feed him for a day. Teach him how to Fischer and you feed him for a lifetime.

That's the spirit!

If you play the Sicilian and he makes an offer of a pawn, you can't refuse.

The cow is of the bovine ilk, one end is moo the other zugzwang.

hahaha, get it?

A horse!, a horse! my kingdom for a Roman Dzindzichashvilli

working on it... Ogden Nash, no? He was a royal punster himself. Still working on it...

I don't know if it accurately fits the dictionary definition of "pun," but I recall reading of a chess team that adopted the name (if I remember it correctly),  "Benoni Saemisch on Ruy with a Caissa Falkbeer."

What's the matter? Are you Lucena rook? XD Get it? (Loosin' a rook)

That was very good, no need to explain, but if you could you explain posts 6 and 7 to me...

He's not talking about a pun. That was not a pun. I dont get it too..

This thread goes Anand on...

Don't just hang around while your father is working. You need to give him compensation for all the hard work he has done. Now go phil that dor with cement so it doesn't come lose during the level 5 pawn storm heading for this town. Also while your at it go tal your brother to get down here and contribute. This family needs to be harmonious in order to be the most effective. Oh and have you practiced your Fien cello lately?If not you need to go do that because your father is in opposition to you continuing to take lessons because you never practice. You simply are not in a position to refuse. We pay for all of your material possessions.

When Nimzovich makes alot of mistakes in his game he's Aaron alot.

Tal order

Short wears short short's

Nimzovich be errorin'

Who's the kings indian?

Tal in the saddle

Navy Sealed moves

Deep Blue's Brothers

The Byrne Supremacy

Morphy's law: "If your position can go wrong, he'll make it go wrong."

LOL! Best one on here.