I lost this one mostly because of tactical mistakes but I think I didn't handle the opening really well and appreciate insights as to how to play against the excchange variation of the Ruy Lopez in order to get something more quiet, more in the vein of a closed Ruy Lopez. It might not be possible but if anyone has a way of fighting against this ...

35.... Rxf3

Yeah 35 is a shocking move.

You have nothing to complain about in the opening: you played fine and I think you had a small advantage by move 13, and a virtually winning position after 16...Bxd1 (White should have played 16.Rxd4 Qxd4 17.Qxg4 f5 but you're better). You seem to have miscalculated with 17...Bxf2+ Did you miss that the N on f2 protected the Rd1? 17...Rfe8 was much better. There's still a lot of work to do, but you're winning

You missed another strong shot with 26...f6! after something like 27.Bf4 Qxg3 28.Bxg3 Re2! Your active Rooks should dominate and win

At the end, you both commit suicide. After 35.Qf3+?? all you had to do was take the Queen. I guess you couln't believe your eyes. Instead, you return the favor, but he accepts and its all over

You handled the opening just fine.

Thanks for the instructive comments.