http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F7IZZXQ89Oc

Thank you, wafflemaster.

Queens are 8, rooks are 4, bishops are 3, knights are 2.5, and pawns are 1.

Hold on. I didn't say anything about queens or rooks. Don't go demoting them now.

Typical girl logic.

Hey. You're talking to a boy. 

Just because I act like a girl doesn't mean I am one.

A better question: why does anyone care what abritrary number is assigned to the "value" of pieces?  It's amazing how much effort is expended upon assigning random numbers to pieces that tell you "how good" they are regardless of the position.  It reminds me of people on the internet bragging about IQ, another favorite topic (http://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/any-others-with-high-iq-suck-at-chess).  Piece values are a random number that mean nothing and prove nothing, as everything is relative and depends on the situation.

Yes, but earlier you said:  "I'm a boy (although I wish I weren't)."  I suggest, sir (or madam), that you are an impostor or double agent! (or something like that).

You are clearly bored.

Only because you're not nearly as much fun about this as I hoped you would be.

But where would you get the boredom that make you want to repeatedly comment on a forum that you don't seem to be contibuting to?

At least he makes redundant/useless topics more interesting

Interestingly, both Andy and VV appear to use the same eye shadow.

WHAT

I don't think I had ever typed that.

Oh great, and now he's Beethoven!  The worst thing about that is that it completely screws up Metastable's very funny joke in #129.