Don't do that artfizz. I didn't mention thy name in vain as the Lord likes to admonish us, but in pain. I followed that link - that was a good laugh. However, considering you're getting more mention on chess.com than the Lord's Prayer in a Protestant church, your lawyer is going to be one hombre rolling in the lucre.

Hmm perhaps I'll say something nice about you when I've wound down some of my chess games and have time for new ones. I'll be hard put to it to do so, but I'll try my best .

Thread revived "Hotposted" for info cakeye especially posts 1 and 19

As a distinguished pillar of his local community, he was invited to hand out the prizes at the end-of-year prize-giving ceremony at the same private girls school. He found it quite difficult to come up with an interesting comment to make to each winner, other than 'Congratulations!' or 'Well done!'.

The final recipient was the head girl, an attractive 17-year old. He made a special effort, and asked her: 'What are you planning to do when you leave school?'

She replied, rather coyly: 'Well, I had thought of going straight home ...'

More skeletons are coming out of your cupboard xqsme ... Better not hotpost that one...

Did u hear about the 2 skellingtons who requested whiskies?

Were told "Sorry no licence to serve spirits !"

Now if only there was someone who remembered Teja from her (probably) misspent youth ...

Dream on .. lol. My youth was spent in productive, glorious fashion sir.. Hmm now I'm wondering about you .. when did you first learn about pubs?

A bishop was visiting America. He had been alerted to the fact that the American media would try to twist anything he said to portray the Church in a poor light. On his arrival in New York, he was confronted by a horde of journalists, all shouting questions at him. He was asked: 'Are you planning to visit any strip joints while you are over here?'

He replied by asking: 'Are there any strip joints in New York?'. This diplomatic answer got a few laughs and he thought he had put one over the Press. The following day's headlines ran:

Bishop's first question on arrival in U.S. : 'Are there any strip joints in New York?'

lol lol I see that you know how the press works ..

It's just as well he wasn't visiting the Caymans. I hear the Press there are real tough guys.

Oh yes and we practise voodoo too .. maybe I should sent u an invitation, artfizz .