If anyone has any funny jokes,puns,and/or riddles,please post them here!

What did the phone give his fiancee when he proposed?

What /hears a math joke for ya What did the acorn say when it grew up ?

two cannibals are eating a clown...one turns to the other and asks..."does this taste funny to you?"

 I don't know...what?

 What did it say?

 ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

it said its age!

sound, signal!

haha

3 men were walking along a street. 2 of them walked into a bar.

The other ducked!

A neutron walks into the bar and asks the bartender for a drink.  He then asks the bartender "How much?"  The bartender then says "For you, no charge."

ncie!

ahah!!!

one more science joke?   Two atoms were talking to eachother.  One said "I think I lost an electron!"  The second one said "Are you sure?"  And the first atom said "Yes I'm positive!"

This is a weird one but here goes:

How do you get a boy off of his bicycle?

You throw a fridge at him!

lol

why did the turkey cross the road?

it was the chicken's day off

"The car won't start," aid a wife to her husband. "I think there's water in the carburettor."

"How do you know?" said the husband scornfully. "You don't even know what the carburettor is."

"I'm telling you," repeated the wife, "I'm sure there's water in the carburettor."

"We'll see," mocked the husband. "Let me check it out. Where's the car?"
"In the swimming pool."