Whoever kills the site first gets a smack to the face and a hug.

Not bad, but you'll have to do better to compete with the big guns.

Is En passant an illegal move on this site?

Seriously somebody ask's this about twice a month and it's killing me. I've taken many people En passant, stop asking and start trying!!!!!

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/chess-players/do-most-chepp-players-lack-a-sence-of-humor features a decent collection. It also features some of the wittiest comments I've seen on this site. The best of both worlds!

Not just any castleing, but Castle queenside?

I can't make these things up:

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/does-chess-have-beatiful-female-players?page=1

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/do-teenage-girls-play-chess-in-southern-california

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/are-there-any-hot-girls-on-this-site-p

http://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/chess-is-the-most-stupid-game-on-the-planet

Ooh ooh!!!

Stairway, you are quite right, you can't make some of those up.

 "You see there are two kinds of people in this world, those with loaded guns and those who dig; you dig."

Kid with a running nose? Shocking.

I can't seem to quote anything tonight, everytime I try it just keeps putting up those straight lines, no words.

I'm serious thogh, it won't let me quote.

Here's my refutation to the King's Gambit:

1.e4 e5 2. f4 exf4! PWNED!!!!!!!

You already know Mr. DA KING!

"Fischer was an idiot."

Submitted by a 1400 something player....

Moles are like trolls, no matter how much they dig, they end up with crap in their mouths (excluding the chess.com crowd).  

Who's smarter?  The puppet or the puppet master?

Don't f--- with puppets;

 Ok ok I give up, uncle.