I'm new here, very happy to participate. I'm surprised at people's reticence in chats. Sure, we're all here to kick each others' butts, but sometimes the mood might be, "I'm playing a very serious player who's likely to make me squirm, I'd better be on my best behavior because I'm learning a lot and I want him to play me again". Again, the mood might be lighter -maybe both parties are really procrastinating after all??-- and, depending on the 2 respective personalities, some good-natured banter might be great fun.

I want to get to know folks either way. How do people on chess.com usually go about this? Is it just a matter of getting used to one another? Do most folks just "shut up and move"?

I used to chat, but I met too many people who were rude.  Now I disable chat and sleep peacefully.

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There are a number of different styles:

- 'Paris Hilton' : become highly visible in the forums by posting a short, pithy comment on every topic (e.g. LOL)

- 'Michael Moore' : pick a controversial topic and defend it fanatically against all comers (e.g. 'the site should NEVER go offline, not even for a few minutes')

- 'Mother Teresa' : go about, quietly making sensible comments in the forums, and not noticing whether anyone notices

- 'Mike Tyson' : weigh in to every forum argument and never concede an inch (centimeter). If anyone disagrees with you, insult them and block them.

It's your choice!

There are all kinds of people here. Some will be chatty and friendly, some don't like a conversation, some will act like idiots etc. Luckily the last group isn't the majority and it's likely that if you belong to the chatty and friendly type, you'll soon find others like you.

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Hey, you forgot the sarcastic cynics.

If u talk the talk u must be able to walk the walk.

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What? If you happen to be mute, you must be paralyzed as well?

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We prefer to be called skeptics, rather than cynics.

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No, you may still be able to walk the walk.

most on here are okay. some are down right rude and annoying. i disabled chat in live chess for a while, but i found myself sometimes wanting to chat and missing it. i recently enabled it again and i've had a few good conversations while playing. however, if i cross an idiot again, i'll have no problems reporting them and blocking them.

that being said, sometimes i'm just not in the mood to chat and i might just ignore you. nothing personal.

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Some of us do yes... But I'm a big fan of Diogenes, and don't mind being called a dog-like the least bit offensive :)

Are you talking about chat during an online (turn-based) game. Or a live game?

If turn based, the time needed to type and read messages doesn't matter, so I usually like to chat.  And if it's an unrated game, and/or if the openent agrees to it, I'll even talk about moves and strategies during the game. It can be a great learning experience.

But I also have played turn-based games with little chat other than pleasantries - "Is it spring where you are yet" etc. Or no chat at all. I'm not offended in the least because if someone doesn't chat in a turn-based game - it's more like a tournament OTB game where the players don't talk and just go for the throat. Nothing wrong with that.  I'm not offended at all, although maybe I will still throw in a "good move!" comment and certainly "good game" at the end, but not expecting a response.

I suppose it's a different situation with live games, because sometimes time is of the essence. I guess in that case you could politely say that it's a pure game only and no chat, and then turn chat off. If the oponnent says "sorry, no chat", that's great. But in a live game if they turn chat off I implicitly understand that we are playing a serious game with no talking, just like a serious OTB game.

From what I read on this forum, there are apparently a lot of jerks playing live games who will just insult or make stupid comments - or even run down the clock until the last second when it's their move in the hope that you abandon the game thinking that they disconnected. I don't have a lot of experience with playing live here, but  I think I would not play a live game here, unless I "knew" them from either the some messaging, the forums, or from turn-based play.

Take care when saying 'gg' or 'gl'.

I believe 100,000 people play correspondence chess here. (?)  Play enough people, and you'll find the company you want.  Chat!  If your opponent doesn't, it's a bad fit.  Move on.  You'll find other people who like to chat as well.

Live chess seems like a den of vipers to me, so I don't play.  I suspect the same principle applies, but I'll let others speak to what to expect while chatting in live chess.

Thanks everybody, this is great fun! Y'all come kick my butt when you get the notion!! ;)