• Member Since: Dec 27, 2011
• Last Login: May 24, 2013
• Profile Views: 576
• Points: 17
• Birthday: Jan 1, 1981

I play chess because I'm a loser from Green Bay and there's nothing to do in Green Bay except brag about winning one super bowl chomping on moldy cheese with ritz crackers (we're all white) and wear hats featuring our only contribution to the modern world - old, curdled, moldy milk with too much salt in it in an attempt to imitate artisans of Europe who had long before already mastered the intricacies of milk fermentation. I learned how to play chess one day when my uncle lost control of his poorly-made american buick in a snowbank and we were forced to wait for a tow truck for 17 hours since it was a weekend. We played chess in the back seat munching on moldy cheddar and pepper jack left over from his 97 year old grandmother's new year celebration the week before. It had been sitting underneath the passenger seat of the cigarette stained foul cat feces stenching car and gained that miraculous green bay moldy flavour we all know so well. Anyway, since the economy collapsed, I became an auto mechanic and a master chess professional spurred completely by this incident alone.