Have you considered hiring a chess coach? I have been considering doing that lately, but I'm worried that that will just make the situation worse, since the lessons may just rub my nose in my own incompetence, which may be educational but I don't feel like paying money for it.
Probably been asked many times before...
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I've considered it but I can't afford one and I don't know how effective one would be and if I'd work with or benefit from their teaching styles, however they may be.
At this point I'm kind of hoping that my future son or daughter, if I ever have kids, has better luck with chess than me.
Chess is a journey.....much like life.....sometimes arduous, disappointing and occasionally painful.....sometimes joyful, inspirational and fulfilling....you will continually encounter setbacks and successes along the way.....like in life just keep on trying to make the best of it, with a determined, positive attitude......with your eyes on the elusive prize keep moving forward.....savoring and embracing the best the journey offers you along the way....
There might be something to inspire you here.....learn to enjoy the process of learning.....and you will surely improve...
Good Chess Books for Beginners and Beyond....
https://www.chess.com/blog/RussBell/good-chess-books-for-beginners-and-beyond
I'm wondering how recent grand masters learnt in the early days. Of course they started at 5 or 6 rather than 22. But did they have tutors or books or videos or did they just play a lot? Of course they have natural talent, something I lack, so they can probably learn easier and faster.