Any french defence player would play 2...d5 then white has choice :
- 3.exd5 with a french exchange with c3. Cannot be bad but not frightening for black...
- 3.d3 to transpose into KIA but after 3...dxe4 4.dxe4, black could trade queen with a level endgame, not very exciting but why not.
- 3.e5 trying to transpose (maybe) into advance variation though black could try 3...d4...
So only transpositions, where white is not sure to get the position he wants. Consequently a bad move order.
Next? 
Any french defence player would play 2...d5 then white has choice :
- 3.exd5 with a french exchange with c3. Cannot be bad but not frightening for black...
- 3.d3 to transpose into KIA but after 3...dxe4 4.dxe4, black could trade queen with a level endgame, not very exciting but why not.
- 3.e5 trying to transpose (maybe) into advance variation though black could try 3...d4...
So only transpositions, where white is not sure to get the position he wants. Consequently a bad move order.
Next?
LoL Just don't destroy my wonderful Francalapin with your unpasteurized cheesy 2...d5. 
2.c3 is not underestimated , it is very well estimated as harmless and with no indipendent value. White has to tranpose to something else sooner or later while denying himself some important options while gaining not even one additional option.
All right, U and IM poucin have convinced me. 
Let me guess , it was among the top engine suggestions.
LoL How incisive! Yeah, I noticed it while adding engine evaluations to this thread:
https://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/list-of-all-400-legal-openings-in-2-plies-master-games
...So only transpositions, where white is not sure to get the position he wants. Consequently a bad move order.
Next?
As someone who plays both the Advance French and the Alapin, all I can say to this is "Yep."
Second Francalapin variation:
LoL Just don't destroy my wonderful Francalapin with your unpasteurized cheesy 2...d5.
Are we supposed to laugh at this point?
Yes, U should laugh sometimes! U are exclusively sarcastic, it's bad for the health. Relax yourself, forget your griefs and .... just laugh open-heartedly.
2.c3 has no purpose on that position. The Alapin's mine plan is to exchange a side pawn for a side pawn instead of giving up d4 for c5.
This would the Macleod Attack against the French.
Bumping this awesome thread!
This underestimated subvariant of French defense (with no official name)
looks quite good to me. Of course, it transposes to a subline of Sicilian: Alapin if black replies with 2...c5.
Any ideas or opinions?