100000 ways you lose chess games

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16 you get matched with someone who has a title when you are only 800 elo

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17: you play bullet

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18 u play against stockfish but buffed x 1000
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19: you die
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20: you go like "OoOOh fORk tHis guY sUckS" then you get mated in 1 move

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21. You play chess during class and the teacher takes away your phone
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22: Your friend tricks u into drawing an he gains elo and I don't

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23: you are in the middle of a game then you get banned because someone noticed that you did something against the rules

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like you type a swear word and you get reported then chess.com sees the report and bans you mid-game

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Like they would care about one lonely report