5,000 Signs You Don't Know Enough About Chess

  • 13 months ago · Quote · #2861


    LoekBergman wrote:

    3026: You can not decide if the next position is legal or not?


    3027: you can not decide in that position who is to move.

    3028: you can not decide what is the result of this game.

    3028: The result is stalemate or checkmate if white moves. So if you can't decide the result of the game you don't not know enough about chess. To make that statement you previously made and say if you can't decide the result you don't know enough about chess proves you don't know enough about chess because you said if you can't decide the result then you don't know enough about chess and if you can decide the result then you don't not know enough about chess, which is what your statement implies, which is the opposite of how it should be proving you don't know enough about chess as I have already just proved twice.

  • 13 months ago · Quote · #2862


    It is a stalemate. The last move must be a capture of a black piece/pawn by either the white king or a white knight. The black king can't move for some moves already, hence had to be there a black piece/pawn on the board. The last move in this game was therefor a white move. Now is it blacks turn and he can't make a legal move. Hence it is stalemate. The position is legal by the way. The last moves could have been for instance

    67... Nh8-g6 68.Nb6-c8 Ng6-e7 69.Nc8xe7 or

    99... d4-d3+ 100.Ke2xd3

  • 12 months ago · Quote · #2863


    3029 (in order to keep this thread going to reach 5000)

    Upon seeing two people playing chess you ask the question: "What is the difference between checkers and chess?"

    (this btw was an actual comment i heard from a 20-something young lady who observed a game a friend and i was playing)

  • 12 months ago · Quote · #2864


    3030 Whadddt? Chess? Didn't you mean cheese? Cheese is surely E zee er. 

  • 12 months ago · Quote · #2865


    3031 -  The King, Queen, Bishop and Knight is on the board. Where is the Joker?

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2866


    3032. You know how to move the pieces, and think that qualifies for knowing how to actually play chess. 

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2867


    3033. Flipping a coin to see if white or black moves first.

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2868


    3034. Chess? Is that a new makeup brand? Ohhdarling. Does it go with my Jimmy Choos? And my doggie woggie? And my Luis Vitton handbag? 

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2869


    3035. Chess? Oh no, that is too difficult for me. Can't we do something nice?

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2870


    3036. The queen has the capability to make a knight move, right?

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2871


    3037. Castling is when you advance a pawn to the eighth rank to get crowned.

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2872


    3038. you think castling is the same as car selling.

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2873


    3039. You think that a castling is some kind of halfling.

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2874


    3040 - Your grandmother wins or draws four out of five games against your play.

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2875


    3041 - Your seven year old neice hesitates to play you OTB because she fears boredom.

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2876


    3042: You think that the chess clock is a launcher.
    3043: You purposely lose on time so that you don't have to show how bad you are. 

  • 10 months ago · Quote · #2877


    3044: You move your your pieces to I file when you're frustrated.

    3045: You resign before you play your first move because you know need to go to the bathroom.

  • 9 months ago · Quote · #2878


    3046: You expect you opponent to resign.

  • 9 months ago · Quote · #2879


    3047: you take the queen.

  • 9 months ago · Quote · #2880


    #3048 when you play a move that you think is good then your oppent belittles you with his responce.

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