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It doesnt matter who you are when you reach your peak you will be perpetually disgusted

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TheNameofNames

I hate all of my ratings, there isnt anything i can really do about it either

CraigIreland

Sure there is. If something makes you feel bad, you have two options. 1) Change that thing. 2) Change the way you feel about that thing. Learning when to apply each is invaluable to your happiness.

TheNameofNames
CraigIreland wrote:

Sure there is. If something makes you feel bad, you have two options. 1) Change that thing. 2) Change the way you feel about that thing. Possessing both these skills and when to apply each is invaluable to your happiness.

i just meant chess, you cant change it on command

CraigIreland
TheNameofNames wrote:
CraigIreland wrote:

Sure there is. If something makes you feel bad, you have two options. 1) Change that thing. 2) Change the way you feel about that thing. Possessing both these skills and when to apply each is invaluable to your happiness.

i just meant chess, you cant change it on command

Then I'd encourage you to change the way you feel about your ratings. They're just a measure of how far you've progressed along the long path of learning Chess. Like many of us, you're a long way down that path but you also have a long way ahead of you. Enjoy the journey and don't worry about the destination.

TheNameofNames
CraigIreland wrote:
TheNameofNames wrote:
CraigIreland wrote:

Sure there is. If something makes you feel bad, you have two options. 1) Change that thing. 2) Change the way you feel about that thing. Possessing both these skills and when to apply each is invaluable to your happiness.

i just meant chess, you cant change it on command

Then I'd encourage you to change the way you feel about your ratings. They're just a measure of how far you've progressed along the long path of learning Chess. Like many of us, you're a long way down that path but you also have a long way ahead of you. Enjoy the journey and don't worry about the destination.

i did and it affects my performance but its better than being upset indefinitely, there isnt really any reason i should be any better than i currently am so ive made peace with it for now anyways

DelightfulLiberty
CraigIreland wrote:
TheNameofNames wrote:
CraigIreland wrote:

Sure there is. If something makes you feel bad, you have two options. 1) Change that thing. 2) Change the way you feel about that thing. Possessing both these skills and when to apply each is invaluable to your happiness.

i just meant chess, you cant change it on command

Then I'd encourage you to change the way you feel about your ratings. They're just a measure of how far you've progressed along the long path of learning Chess. Like many of us, you're a long way down that path but you also have a long way ahead of you. Enjoy the journey and don't worry about the destination.

This is extremely hard to do. Humans are wired to compare and compete, so breaking that mindset is very difficult.

Do you have any techniques you use to stop yourself caring about your status or ability compared to others?

KeSetoKaiba
TheNameofNames wrote:

I hate all of my ratings, there isnt anything i can really do about it either

Nope, I'm at a personal peak rating now and it feels pretty nice grin.png

@TheNameofNames you've been on chess.com for a while, so I don't know if you remember when I wrote this blog post, but what you describe might fit into this. You WILL feel perpetually disgusted with your chess if you have the wrong mindset going into it (and many have this mindset, or develop it over time without realizing it). Keep the emphasis on learning and improving more than the ever-fluctuating numbers and hopefully this blog can help you:

https://www.chess.com/blog/KeSetoKaiba/chess-motivation-through-purpose

MartinMacT

I have played chess all my life and only became more than dimly aware of ratings/gradings when I joined chess com three years ago. I must have had them in the past, because when I was young I variously played for Sussex, London University, Surrey, Hampshire, and Dorset as I moved around the country.

If you enjoy the game, ratings/gradings don't mean a thing.

DelightfulLiberty

For some. But plenty both enjoy the game and care about ratings. Some care especially because they value the game.

magipi

TheNameofNames is a guy who complained about being stuck at 900 in 2021, complained about being stuck at 1100 in 2022, and now he complains about being stuck at 1300.

KeSetoKaiba
magipi wrote:

TheNameofNames is a guy who complained about being stuck at 900 in 2021, complained about being stuck at 1100 in 2022, and now he complains about being stuck at 1300.

Yeah, it is a pattern of complaining, but they still might be telling the truth each time. Stuck is stuck and each time might be for a different reason. Hopefully my blog post will help them navigate the reason this time.

magipi
KeSetoKaiba wrote:
magipi wrote:

TheNameofNames is a guy who complained about being stuck at 900 in 2021, complained about being stuck at 1100 in 2022, and now he complains about being stuck at 1300.

Yeah, it is a pattern of complaining, but they still might be telling the truth each time.

What I did not point out that he creates a whining topic practically every week. He puts infinitely more effort into complaining than into learning, and somehow still improves. Amazing.

DelightfulLiberty

Maybe that's where I'm going wrong? If I complained more, maybe I'd improve faster

Regalbeginning

As pointed by @KeSetoKaiba I have also reached my peak and now trying to get over the feeling of being left out. You have to understand that not all of us are meant to progress as fast as the Prodigy next door, who crosses rating barriers like a piece of cake. The last barrier I had like this was around 1700. Then almost a year later I broke 1800 and then within a few months reached 2000. Now after reaching 2100 I have been stuck for more than 4 to 5months. I am trying my best to improve while not getting burnt out. You just have to change the way on how you look at ratings.

Hoffmann713

A suggestion, just to improve the usability of the forum.

Given that now 50% of new threads are of the type :

- How can I reach 1000 ?- How can I reach 1200 ? - How can I reach 1355 ? - How can I get 1432+ ? - How can I get to 874 from 521 ? - Stuck at 500 - Stuck at 600 - Stuck at 740 - I was at 1020, now I'm back at 923 - I suck - I'm not good at chess - I’m horrible at chess - I'm stupid

etc. ,

perhaps it would be a good idea to open a specific section of the forum, "Tears and rating improvements", reserved for those who ask for suggestions for their improvement and/or those who wish to reflect on chess/human misery.

As I said, just to make the forum clearer and easier to follow and less dispersive.

wink

Regalbeginning

#15 no. I wasn't referring to you. But if your progress was that fast, then congratulations. You are a good chess player.

TheNameofNames
magipi wrote:

TheNameofNames is a guy who complained about being stuck at 900 in 2021, complained about being stuck at 1100 in 2022, and now he complains about being stuck at 1300.

tbf i dont think i really complained about being stuck at 900 because i was only there very briefly when i hit 1200 i started to "complain" because it was taking an entire year of playing to improve

TheNameofNames
magipi wrote:
KeSetoKaiba wrote:
magipi wrote:

TheNameofNames is a guy who complained about being stuck at 900 in 2021, complained about being stuck at 1100 in 2022, and now he complains about being stuck at 1300.

Yeah, it is a pattern of complaining, but they still might be telling the truth each time.

What I did not point out that he creates a whining topic practically every week. He puts infinitely more effort into complaining than into learning, and somehow still improves. Amazing.

I definitely do not complain or "whine" every week, im angry about my rating but im not whining. Whining would be me creating a spam post and then responding to every reply and trying to justify the post, im frustrated about my performance so i made a topic about it and btw as annoying as it seems and i hate to say this because i dont whine, it is chess related and it's allowed so i dont know who made you arbiter of the forums