Corrupt a Wish

Granted, but it is pie flavour (see asdf movie 2)

I wish I had a cake

Granted, but it is fishcake (which I doubt you like).

I wish I do not exist.

Actually, I do like fishcake

Granted, but it turns out that a safe that only you know the combination to has a cure for cancer.

I wish I had won the European Schools Chess Championships

Granted, you do not exist.

I wish I was happy.

"I wish I had won the European Schools Chess Championships"

Granted, but you get accused of making a wrong move because a video emerged showing you had touched another piece, so they take your win away.

"I wish I was happy."

Granted. You become happy, but everybody else becomes miserable. They, seeing you so happy, decide to make your life miserable.

I wish Bobby Fischer taught me everything he knew about chess.

Granted. But you didn't understand any of what he said, so you learn nothing.

I wish the world was quieter.

Granted, but people start posting on a similar thread instead.

I wish I won the world championship.

Granted. Everybody stops posting in this thread. However, people's posts in all other Corrupt a Wish threads end up here.

I wish i learned everything anybody ever taught me.

Edit: "I wish I won the world championship."

Granted. You won the world championship at losing.

Wish granted, but you were taught nothing.

I wish I had a fireproof pillow

Granted. Your house and everything else burns down except for the pillow.

I wish i had pizza for dinner tonight.

Wish granted, but the delivery guy dropped it (box open, pizza face down) on the pavement when he fought a mob he ran into in a dark alley.

I wish everything was indestructable.

Granted, including things that you don't want to be indestructable, such as garbage.

I wish I had a penthouse apartment.

Granted, but you would run out of money from paying the rent and be kicked out.

I wsh I had a better chessboard.

Granted, but it costs you 1000$.

I wish I had a penthouse apartment for free.

Granted. Your free penthouse apartment is condemned. It's completely run-down, and infested with all types of pests. Since you now own it, you'll have to pay the property tax which is huge due to the size of it.

I wish i was a god that everybody worshiped.

You are all welcome to join Team Wild.The teams name is 

IT'S WILD!!

here's the link http://www.chess.com/groups/view/its-wild

Thanks.

@Sunshiny

Granted, but your fame gets to your head and a higher and stronger god throws you down from the sky into a pit of fire.

I wish we all lived in a real utopia that conquers all evil.