My senior relatives liked to tease me at weddings, saying things like, “You’ll be next!” They stopped once I started doing the same to them at funerals.

My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. So I unplugged his life support.

Today, I asked my phone “Siri, why am I still single?” and it activated the front camera.

I was reading a great book about an immortal cat the other day. It was impossible to put down.

The doctor gave me one year to live, so I shot him with my gun. The judge gave me 15 years. Problem solved.

My grief counselor died. He was so good, I don’t even care.

I love dark humor, if you couldn't already tell.

Let's see how well you know me:

https://buddymeter.com/quiz.html?q=TWkivUS

ImissMarianna