Everything I experienced seems like a fever dream, something that never happened. I used to be happy here. The short time I was active on this site and the few friendships I made... I wish it had never ended. That I could still be happy. That I wasn't descending into a spiral of apathy, unhappiness, and emptiness. I was in the most special time of my life. And of hope, only one word remained: goodbye.

I had a friendship here. It was very important to me. And it still is. We completely lost contact because of things that happened to me that, well, weren't really under my control. My bones grew colder with each passing day. Nothing improved. I had no choice but to leave.

If you, my friend, are still reading this text on my profile, I apologize. You know I'm talking about you because you were one of the only true friends I've ever had, and I still think about you a lot. I was stabbed in the back by my companions at the worst possible time and I'm still broken inside. I hope, at least, that during all the time we talked, you smiled at least once.

Also, I apologize for my terrible English, which led to some, to say the least, embarrassing situations. You have no idea how many times I kept dwelling on it. It was horrible. I hope the future will be better. I will cherish our memories. I'm still very hurt because of, well, everything, but I'm trying to move on with my life. May the darkness not be eternal, and may the roses bloom again... someday.

In a tiny time, i hope…

ATUALIZATION

I'm feeling a little better now, thankfully. The year is starting to give me new opportunities to start over, and well, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to be active here again, by the way; I received a lot of affection from some people here, and to all of them, please accept my heartfelt thanks. I don't know how I could possibly thank you for such kindness, and it made my day better. For those who looked at this before February, you saw something else I wrote here, a little sad too, because I accidentally stumbled upon chess.com in my browser and wanted to review what I had written, and I had an almost desperate urge to add to what I wanted to say before. It may seem like I'm just being formal writing this, but I wanted to thank from the bottom of my heart all the users who kindly sent me a private message, or in the comments of some of my posts. It's beautiful to see kindness in such a difficult world to live in.

ALSO, i am gonna contact this old friend that i had, here. again, THANK YOU for everyone, i'll remember that. The good we do for others comes back to us in other ways. Goodbye!

CheetahBr24