A friend and I like to play chess, but we live a distance apart. We were happy to find this venue. In the couple of days since I have been on it, I've tried playing a couple of live chess games with just whomever I get connected with. I think I have my settings correct in that I am a novice player. There have been a couple of games that I have begun, and then the other player aborts them. Why? Am I taking too long or something? I'd like to know what area I'm supposed to be playing in while I'm learning this website and the intricacies of the different settings, etc., so that I don't irritate people needlessly. Thanks.

Also if you're very new, you may be thinking about your first move.  If so people will probably assume there's a bad connection and abort.

A while back Chess.com instituted a rule that each player must make his first move in 15 to 20 seconds or the game automatically aborts.  This was so people didn't have to wait forever on a game where your opponent simply walked away.  A lot of newcomers to the site don't know this of course and the result is predictable....

Thanks for the replies and the comments.  I'm going to try to figure out if I have the ranges set correctly.  I don't usually have to think about my first three moves or so, so I do not think it had to do with an automatic time-out, but maybe it did.  I have to get used to clicking on the "submit" button.