No offense, pawn, seriously, but because of the scattered, one-word, small phrases, this kind of reminded me a lot of the refridgerator poetry magnets.
I blame them, not you - they're the ones that trivialized and discounted the form.
ballroom dancers
interstice
timing rhythm
rhyme
movement
checked
features glancing
exasperating lines centers
motioning horizon hidden
trapping aspirations
limiters;
the ballet of two armies
into a conclusion:
make the last move first