That's why I am forming my group (Writch's Coven - as related in the News post) because by joining, you are "asking for it" so to speak as well as committing to give construcive criticism. In there, I'll ask that you be honest, but there is no need to be brutally honest - you can couch it in respectful terms.
That is also why I want to facilitate it - meaning keeping comments out of it from non-participants as well as impressing participants to give feedback as we give "coaching" (as Cap put it) to them.
It is very, very difficult to leave your emotional investments at the door in these types of groups because the stuff you pour yourself into are as precious to you as your children - and parents do not take kindly to other folks telling them how to raise their child. But if you want your children to grow-up and be successful and not live in the sandbox their whole life, you need to give them some "tough love."
Do you find it hard to tell people what you really think of their writing? I mean, do you only share what you liked about a piece, leaving out anything that irked you? Of course, it's very important to be constructive and to suggest what might have made it better for you rather than just complain and point to what you don't like, but is it raining on someones parade to do anything but heap praise on their work?
It takes alot of courage to post work for someone who, like me, isn't very adept or experienced at having their stuff on display. While I welcome any critique, and actually hope to hear what some of the people here have to say that might help me improve, Perhaps some people don't want to HAve to hear it? Should I be forcing people to hear what I think about their writing? After all they haven't specifically ASked for it. Or is it important to not let this group be just a mutual admiration society?
If I've posted something about your story that upset you in the past, I am sorry. Keep in mind though that I only read stuff that I like - if It doesn't suit my taste I'll just stop reading and look at the next post. Alot of posts I don't even get to read. So If I have posted a critical message to you take heart , The fact that I took the time at all means I really dug what you had writtten !