I'll start with Chemistry jokes:
Nerdy Jokes
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I got this one from A_G_A:
Dude: What can I do with copper glasses?
Other Dude: [sigh] WHAT?
Dude: I can c u (see you, Cu = copper)
I've got another chem joke. It's right on the tip of my tungsten!
What element has the fastest processing speed?
UnunPENTIUM.
What kind of clothing does a math teacher wear?
An alge-bra!
What is a math teacher's favorite plant?
A geome-tree!
Jan 23, 2015
0
#8
Not really a nerdy joke, but:
What are the most educated type of vegetation?
Reeds.
There are 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, and those who don’t.
Five people, each the best in their profession, are brought together. There's an engineer, a physicist, a mathematician, a philosopher, and an accountant. They are all faced with the question "What is 2 + 2?"
The engineer takes out a calculator, types on it for a minute, and then says, "It's about 3.99."
The physicist runs a computer program and says, "The answer lies between 3.98 and 4.01."
The mathematician thinks for a while and says, "I don't know the answer, but I could prove an answer exists."
The philosopher thinks for a while and asks, "What you do mean by 2 + 2?"
The accountant stands up, makes sure all of the windows are closed, locks the door, looks around suspiciously and finally says, "What do you want the answer to be?"
Bad grammar is something up with which I will not put!
Knock-knock?
Who's there?
2
Two who?
No, no. To whom!
Hahahaha! That's the best one yet!
LongIslandMark wrote:
It so happened in one tribe of American Indians that three of the squaws were with child.
When the time came for the first squaw to deliver, she lay on a hide of buffalo and gave birth to three boys. The tribe was overjoyed to welcome the new braves.
When the second squaw was ready to delivery, she lay on a hide of antelope, and to even more rejoicing, the tribe welcomed four new braves
When the time came for the third squaw to deliver, there were no more hides available, so she lay near the fire, which was cooking a stew in a tall kettle.
When she gave birth to five boys, she was greeted with polite congratulations, but apparently no great surprise.
“Why are you not surprised by my five sons?”, she asked.
The reply was, of course, “Everyone knows that the sons of the squaw of the high-pot-in-use equals the sons of the squaws of the other two hides!”
That's a good one! I heard a similar version of this joke, but this one is better as the other version involved a hippotamus rather than a high-pot-in-use.
Greetings, fellow Intellectuals. This is a thread intended for the purpose of sharing nerdy humor, ideally of an intellectully-complex nature.