no clue what my opponent was smoking these two games but please pass it over

i was black first game 

https://www.chess.com/analysis/game/live/17116311753

i was white second game

https://www.chess.com/analysis/game/live/17116927759?tab=analysis

also please dont make too much fun of me for constantly missing mate in 1 and 2 during the second game XD

You constantly missed mate in 1 or 2 in the second game XD

yes, yes i did but well glance over that part

with the low rating that you have how do you want to play good people?

IDK about your second game but I think your first game is the best game ever played by a 550 rated player