Society, what to do about?

Has anyone else experienced these problems? I have eschewed meat since 1990, though I have eaten fish in many of those years. For a time (about three years ago), I was vegan, and for an even shorter time, a raw foodie. Here's my problem with the latter two diets: what do you do when you go to an ordinary restaurant, or dine in someone else's home? Don't tell me (re the restaurant) "just order a salad" -- ordinary restaurants have very ordinary salads and they are boring beyond belief; there is only so much I can take of that. As for dining in someone's home -- well, all my friends know my food preferences, but every once in a while I got stuck in a situation where the host/hostess did not know. I REFUSE to have a fuss made over me, so I very politely decline the meat (without long explanations) or, if it's already been served, eat around it. But it wasn't just the meat -- while I was vegan, I ate no animal products, either. And when I was a raw foodie, the restrictions were even greater. Mind you, they were not restrictions to me, as I knew what wonderful concoctions I could make and enjoy, but they were restrictions when I went OUT somewhere to eat, where the options were non-existent.

I would like to make a note here that during my brief raw foodie period, I lost weight, felt GREAT, and was full of joy. But eating out in "ordinary" places with "ordinary" people was a hassle. Not to blame society, but I was too weak-willed to battle it all alone as NONE of my friends shared my diet preferences, so little by little, bit by bit, I gave up on the raw foods, and even on the vegan life style. Not to blame them, but "the flesh is willing, but the spirit is weak." Now I just say no to meats.

I was wondering whether anyone else in this group has run into similar problems, and how you handle it.

Thanks.

Wow, cool story Anda.

I have been vegetarian since 1989 so we are similar.  I was in university back then so i wasn't a big restaurant person at the time.  Mostly we went to fast food places.  There were very few veggie burgers so I found myself eating french fries and onion rings.  Not a good plan.

I think because I began this journey as a smart-ass militant animal rights ethical vegetarian I probably was more of a bother for the others at my table than the other way around.

To this day my parents blame pretty much all my problems on my being vegetarian.  Of course it balances out because I pretty much blame all my problems on them.  haha.

I guess after twenty years of having people ask me the same questions I have given up answering.  

It always ends up in someone giving me a lecture on how I am a hypocrite because I have a leather jacket or that eggs are animals or that people are designed to eat meat.

So now I do something like this...

Q: Why are you vegetarian?

A: Please pass the potato salad.

Q: Do you wear leather?

A: Did you hear Simon left American Idol?

Q: Did you know Hitler was a vegetarian?

A: I just got some 

Q: Do you wear leather?

A: Walmart is having a sale on men's high heels.

Q: Just try a tiny piece.  It's already dead.

A: My other car is a Porsche.

Q: Felafel?  What's that?

A: Did you prefer Rocky, Rocky II, Rocky III, Rocky IV, Rocky V, or Rocky Balboa?

Very interesting, Jeffrey. But I didn't mean that I had a problem answering people who are interested enough to ask me questions. I meant my own problem of sticking to my regimen when the restaurant/party/ whatever didn't offer any reasonable options. These days more and more restaurants are offering vegetarian choices. But I really want to be VEGAN but find it very hard to do in the midst of this meat-eating, cooked-food society. I realize I don't need to let them dictate what I should or should not eat, but what I'm saying is that at a typical party, there are often NO choices, if one is that strict. And my question was to others: what do YOU do if you're faced with such a dilemma? A raw food diet, especially, is difficult to maintain without some support from others.

My own family has no interest in being vegetarian, vegan or raw foodie. I cook for them, and I cook what they want, which is really, really difficult. But I do not believe in imposing my beliefs on others. My mother is 93 years old -- there is no way I'm going to say "You eat what I cook, period!" (However, I must say she's had less and less interest in meat in recent years.)

Is anyone in this group vegan or a Raw Foodie? I'd really like to know how they handle living in the midst of others who are not.

I have had these problems too.  I would like to try being a vegan, but it seems that every time I try, there ends up being a situation where I just have no access to that kind of food. Also, current packaging makes it very hard to find out what foods have "hidden ingredients" that are vegetarian and not.  i.e., "natural flavors" is impossible to tell whether it is vegetarian. 

Anyone else have any thoughts?

Do you have some ethical or religious commitments to prevent you from enjoying special occassions and participating in being a little unpredictable?  

If not the I say..

Go for whatever floats your boat and makes you and a few people around you smile.

I personally feel that if those are my beliefs, then they shouldn't change on "special occasions"

I agree with mprhchess that if I have a set of beliefs, I'd rather not change them for "special occasions". The first time I went the vegetarian route -- in the early 1980's (many of you weren't even born yet!), I had decided that I wouldn't make a "big deal" of it and eat whatever was available in awkward situations. Well, there was one "exception" after another. Of course, keep in mind that in those days we didn't have NEARLY the number of vegetarian choices we have today, so being strict in those days would have really taken a very strong resolve. After a couple years of this, I simply gave up. But when I became a born-again vegetarian in 1990, I swore I wouldn't ever let meat touch my lips. That part was not difficult, especially as vegetarianism became less and less an oddity and more options appeared in restaurants and supermarkets.

The trouble started when I wanted to go vegan. No cheese, no butter, no eggs, no CHEESE? Did you say no CHEESE? That was my toughest hurdle, but -- funny! -- how one gets used to it, and how much better one feels. But I was definitely a misfit in society. In a way, i liked that (this part of the discussion belongs in the other group in the forum about ordinary vs. unordinary people), but in another way -- I went hungry when their was nothing for me to eat!

I'm one to either DO it or NOT do it. I have many faults, but moderation is not one of them. I'm either a vegan, or I quit and I'm not. So I quit. Same with the raw food diet.

Forgive me. I think I'm really repeating myself. Ah -- wait till you young 'uns reach my age!

:)

AAAGH!! I posted a reply and it disappeared and it was long and I can't be bothered typing it out again...sigh...

I did say that working in a couple of kitchens we'd sometimes have customers ring ahead with any special diet requirements, vegan, vegetarian (although most restaurants usually have vegetarian options these days), allergies or diabetics that way the chef would have time to rearrange a few of the meals to suit so the person has options or prepare something. It's usually not a problem. As for dinner parties, same thing, ring and tell the person you're a vegan and offer to bring a plate. Just a couple of ideas

Yes, I tried the same thing as anda and at first would make

"exceptions" (although it wasn't in 1980 ;) when there was no other options. I don't do that anymore though, and this makes being vegan too hard.