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Invent the new worst/most useless chess piece ever!

  • #1

    Invent the worst/most useless chess piece ever! I start; For example: the retarded pawn - it moves back every time you move your b1 knight.

  • #2

    The butler - it moves one square at a time diagonally and can only capture the enemy king. xP

  • #3

    the derp kills only your pieces and is immortal

  • #4
    Ballofwhacks wrote:

    The butler - it moves one square at a time diagonally and can only capture the enemy king. xP

    I was gonna post it but called mine the lame-o and wasn't limited to just capturing the king. 

  • #5

    Also there's a gambit called the retarded pawn gambit:



  • #6

    The hammer time. piece can move side to side in one turn. cannot be touched.

  • #7

    the pewn - it eats one of your own pieces per turn every time you dont move it

  • #8

    The Death Chamber--it takes up 5 spaces at once and replaces the Queen, same colored bishop, and the d,e, and f pawns. The Death Chamber can move diagonally one space and can only capture if a piece is on the top left or right corner. Pieces in any other position tha the top left or right corner cause block the Death Chamber from moving (like blocking a pawn by putting in front).

    see poorly drawn picture below

  • #9

    In other words, it can't move, trapping the king forever unless it's captured.

  • #10

    the guest - this piece moves randomly around the board, disturbing the game. It can't be eaten but it eats the pieces that stay in the square where it goes - if there's your king, then u lose. Horrible

  • #11

    The enprise, it hangs your pieces

  • #12

    The sexy pawn - it distracts your pieces and you lose control of them, and your ELO gets decreased.

  • #13

    the-01101010001

    this piece just stays in h6 and watches. It has a ''hidden power'': his face changes to 'happy' when you move your king. 

  • #14

    the-ckastler it looks like a rook and it castles and protects your queen.

  • #15

    Most useless piece ever?!

    You mean more useless than black's LSB in the French????

  • #16
    varelse1 wrote:

    Most useless piece ever?!

    You mean more useless than black's LSB in the French????

    yeah

  • #17
    Idrinkyourhealth wrote:

    the pewn - it eats one of your own pieces per turn every time you dont move it

    lol

  • #18

    The drunkard - he moves one square in any random direction (determined by a roll of a die), capturing whatever is in his way, everytime a person moves.

  • #19

    the-friendly-cow - basically occupiyng the left side of the board... it moves itself 1 square forward every 3 turns. White has no pieces in the left side - there is a cow instead... and cow and forces to black to develope his left side before being crushed by it's unstoppable advancement.

  • #20

    The beeched whale. starts the game on the e4/5 squares. because it's out of the sea it suffocates under it's own weight and dies before the first move is made.

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