i guess it challenges me
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That the board is a constant, that anyone can play, that it has a complex history, that it’s the one thing I wasn’t judged for until I truly played it for fun, that it’s a safe space, that it’s given me a community that respects me, that as long as you think logically and play well you can overcome those more powerful than you, and that no matter the result, it’s all what you did (unless there was some mouseslip or something.) and other people can’t break you down, change the moves you play just as you are about to succeed. In chess, you can fight for yourself in a way that you sometimes can’t do in life. And if you lose, you can welcome that and grow and accept that your opponent played well, blocking out demeaning (rather than constructive which you should use to grow) criticism and focusing on improvement, and when losses frustrate you and you tilt, you can remember that if you won every chess game it wouldn’t be fun, and playing would be pointless, where failure or losing in life often leads to conflict and yelling and torment. Chess is an equalizer in all of the imbalances of the world. That’s why I like it.