How do you deal with being a beginner (the emotional side)

@wornaki. I'm of the view that intuition is not a natural born ability. It develops from the process of study, practising puzzles, drills, etc You could reframe all the drudgery as 'working on your chess intuition'. All the great players have been through the same process. I suspect the 'natural born' story is a myth to bolster a public image. Most sports, hobbies, etc have popular myths associated with their grandees.

You're right, Mark. I was comparing something that you can be born with, with something like chess intuition that is developed over time. Some people are just more naturally athletic than others, and I suspect that most top athletes fit into that category, but that's getting off topic.

As for chess intuition, I'm in agreement that it's not something that you're born with. Then, though, the question arises as to why some people improve extremely quickly and others, like OP, struggle to improve? Is it a difference in training methods? Or do the fast improvers just 'get' the game? I'm sure each group would have different answers.

I think there is a certain amount of 'getting' the game but then the question is why? Does it appeal to people with a more logical thought processes? Though I think is a lazy line as there is a great deal of creativity and nonlinear thinking in chess. Does it requires above average skills at categorizing and organising? And to what extent are all these natured or nurtured. I suspect some very basic processes are innate and there will be differences but I dont know what they are. I frame my own improvement to date as one of stopping bad habits and developing good habits based around the basic principles of chess. The extent to which an individual can exercise self discipline and restraint (e.g. dont attack until your king is safe) may also be a success factor. None of these are directly related to chess of course, but I feel these more primitive (life) skills are the places to look. Everything else builds on them. Or maybe it's just enthusiasm and hard work after all.

Those are all very good questions which would be interesting to find out the answers to. Perhaps I'll see if any papers have been published on those subjects. In the end, I think most people would agree that developing good chess habits around the basic principles is the quickest way to improve until your competition requires that you need a deeper understanding to progress further.

LOL. I have many losses that fall into the category of "not following my own advice". Deep down I new it was a bad move because it violates a principle, but I did it anyway and regretted it soon after. Breaking bad habits isnt always easy. For general reading, Ive read The Power Of Habit by Charles Duhigg which was interesting. Malcolm Gladwell also touches this subject, I'm thinking of Outliers. They are popular science. I'm not a psychologist, I'd have no idea where to start with the academic field. That said, popular science books often lean on academic work so can be a good starting place if you are not in the field. There is always google scholar of course.

I think most of us have had MANY of those types of losses haha. Thanks for the suggestions, I'll be sure to take a look. As for the academic side, I'm not really in the field any more, but I do have the experience from my psychology degree to help me find any papers if they're out there. Google Scholar isn't as bad as its reputation would suggest so maybe I'll start there.

When I was a complete beginner, I was in fifth grade (2.5 years ago) and I didn't even realize that I sucked. I still suck, but then I was rated 800, yet I still thought I was good because I could beat other children my age in tournaments and at school. 

Sat at home playing an anonymous person in online chess has removed all anxiety for me.

Everyone has to be a beginner at some point, even world champions. My ego isn't being hurt by being a beginner, my main problem is losing motivation when i lose 80% of the OTB games i play at my local club or tournaments. It isn't particularly fun competing for avoiding ending up at the absolute bottom in the result list. I also believe i would enjoy chess more if i had a deeper understanding of the game. It would be more rich and deep.

Well, that's what I'm talking about. But for me its not about me fighting to get half a point out of 10 games. My sadness is because I can't play richer deeper chess...

@tempaiTurbo 

and then there's 

#5: Good - you're at least a decent titled player

I like this part. I believe that a little humility can go a long way for improvement long-term; this is especially true for chess. Similarly, the realization that rating is merely an estimate and not equivalent to ability or accomplishments also helps. 

I also think that there is a distinct difference between "beginner" who is not the best in ability but seeking to improve and the stereotype "patzer" who is of close ability but just doesn't study or care to improve. Interestingly, that is perfectly okay. Some people don't want to put in the time to improve because being good or great at chess isn't a high priority for them. 

As a beginner, stick with the mindset of learning and you'll indirectly improve your rating over time.

yes this is very hard to read...even if i do understand it know....it's descriptive...

Hi @wornaki I think the hardest part for me of dealing with the emotional side of being a beginner (adult beginner especially) is accepting how I feel. Same for any other negative emotion I suppose. It can feel humiliating to play against someone in primary school who then wipes the floor with you - I don't think anyone would enjoy that. It can make me angry, frustrated and bring up feelings of inadequacy - all ugly and ignoble sentiments which are hard to accept (I'm not like that !!) but are a part of me whether I like it or not. It's a cliche but acceptance is the first part of letting go, I'm not an ugly ignoble man, I'm a good man who has ugly ignoble feelings sometimes.
This helps create the spark of self compassion which is the antidote to self blame or self hatred allowing a process of change from ugly destructive feelings to beautiful creative ones. 
Last month I played my first combination in a game that actually worked after months of effort playing clunky lumpy chess. It will never be in a book - I'm no Capablanca and never will be - but it was graceful and elegant, a little bit of Capablanca
All of lifes endeavours are hard, it's the process of change that makes the journey worthwhile not the destination. Good Luck. 

Yep. Luckily, there are a few things we can do about ut:

1. Accepting that our understanding of chess is limited. 2. Keep learning new things and make improvements, even if it is the smallest thing. 3. Stop comparing our selves to masters. It is just pointless. The game is enjoyable at any level.

hummm nah only when winning and that mostly happen at 1250+ here