I feel like throwing the towel in

In this game I missed several opportunities to force a checkmate and even missed two or three actual checkmates around moves 26 - 28. 

I can't believe I let this one slip through my fingers. I've been so focused on trying to get my openings to a good level and survive the first 20 or so moves, trying to get on the front foot and I miss this.

I feel like I'm really a 400 player in disguise. I think my wins have been flukes (usually my opponents resign or abort or perhaps rage quit). In games that go the distance and where I'm evenly matched I just can't break through.

There's just too much to take in. And this loss has really made me despondent. 

Is there anything in there that I can take as a positive? Or was that just a terrible game? 

Also is it worth taking an actual chess lesson? 

I played White here. 

Don't beat yourself up too much, a strong opening can make a difference, you're right to focus on improving it and trying different openings. Heck I did that dropped to almost 500 ELO rating myself brought it up to 850 now. You mentioned if it's worth taking an actual chess lesson. Absolutely! I use to have the diamond membership on here and loved it every bit. Helped me strategize more. Don't throw in the towel just yet don't forget to analyze your matches and learn from them. The more you play the better those muscle memory kicks in. Practice daily and analysis.

Every loss is tough, and some more than others, but don't give up! I am also a relative beginner, so take this with a huge grain of salt, but I noticed a number of problems with your opening. First, you should generally take black's pawn on d5 when black plays the Scandinavian defense. Second, you made a pointless check with your bishop on move 4 which made you lose time by having to retreat on your next move. Third, you pushed your b pawn on move 8 for no apparent reason. Remember, time is of the essence in the opening. Lastly, on move 9 you should've probably moved your bishop to c4 to control the open diagonal. Overall, I think you wasted time and played too passively. You allowed black to take the initiative almost right away. I think correcting some of these things would go a very long way.

Thanks.

I'm just mad at myself for missing those checkmates.  I knew there was a mate in there but I thought it would be Qb8, which was defended by the bishop and then blacks queen. 

This is what I've been trying to work on. I started a thread last week in which I discussed the fact I seem to lose the initiative after so many moves. Even if I do play a strong opening, often by move 20 I'm on the backfoot.  Some posters did say that I was using too many moves doing very little. 

I'm not clued up on systems and set defences or how to work them. I've been told to just focus on good opening principals and ignore more or less my opponents systems (at least until I'm higher rated). Maybe that's a mistake.

I played b3 on move 8 to defend my bishop in case it came under attack later.  I don't get what you mean about the bishop, it's already on c4 by that point? 

Thanks anyhow for taking a look. 

A lot of beginners have this problem. Beginners often focus on making small gains like capturing this or that piece and don't realize they may be 1 or 2 moves away from winning suddenly. It's worth practicing keeping your eyes on your opponent's king at all times. Not only will you not miss checkmate, but merely threatening checkmate can lead to a lot of other tactics.

I'm sorry I meant f4.

The computer does say b3 is a mistake and that at that point Black has the advantage in the game. The best move apparently was bishop to f7 capturing the pawn.  I wouldn't have thought that prudent. 

It isn't until move 17 that the report says I'm on the front foot. And to be honest that was probably because Black didn't play too well either.  I've had a look at some of the opponents games who have beaten me and to be honest they seem to lose in much the same way I do. 

I guess it's all just a learning curve at this level.  

You're correct. At that rating level, no one is playing an objectively good game of chess. The winner is the player who makes the least (or least costly) blunders. You have already distinguished yourself insofar as you are at least trying to identify your weaknesses and improve upon them. It takes time, but hang in there.

I can see how this game would frustrate you...but on the positive side it was quite complicated and you navigated the complications well to put yourself in position to give mate. OK, you missed the chance but it happens. You have looked and see and understand what you missed, the key is to bank that in the memory for similar future situations. Consider yourself a promising striker - eventually you will start taking your chances. The worry is if you are not in position to have the chances in the first place. 

dude, dont give up, it was a pretty nice game. i have been really mad lately when i missed quite big moves playing a DAILY game with like 7 days a move lol. we are all learning here

cheers!

No I won't give up. I was just having a moment earlier. 

I just played this as my last game of the day and it made me feel better. A win on move 6, (my opponent blundered). I know a win is a win, but should it be so? (My opponent here resigned).  

I blundered mate in 1 in a winning position yesterday.

I also drew a game I could have won 5 different ways.

It happens to everyone, especially in speed games.

Yeah - someone said in one topic that they've seen GM's miss mate in games. 

This was more of a case of a beginner not being able to "see" the mate. I knew there was a mate in that area and I think my rook/queen on the same file was a good move. I certainly wouldn't have gotten that far a month ago, so I am improving. 

I've blundered mate in 1 several times. And in fact, today I lost to a 700 rating.

Hey, a win is a win!  

And it's okay, we all feel frustrated sometimes. It happens; lost to a 700 quite literally yesterday. Keep going, friend! People have given great advice, and, as they have said, it takes time. Hang in there; you have recognized your weakness and that's the first step towards great improvement!

     First--Realize that at your playing strength all games are decided by who makes the most (and most serious) mistakes. Were you playing stronger players they would be showing you that you are making more mistakes than you think. 

     Second--Don't worry so much about winning. Many chess teachers, particularly when coaching tyros, say "Two things can happen in a game: you can win or you can learn something." Realize that if you want to become a strong enough player to produce games you can be proud of, it will take a long time.

     Third--Get help studying the game, either through books meant for inexperienced players (Tarrasch's "The Game of Chess", Capablanca's "Chess Fundamentals", Chernev's "Logical Chess" or the many others you see recommended on this site) or with an actual coach; many tutors advertise on this site. 

     Fourth--Pay less attention to openings. You will waste a lot of time trying to memorize all the variations in just a few openings. Know the main lines in a couple of defences and lines you like vs defences you come up against frequently. It is more important to understand what each side is trying to accomplish. Having a plan to pursue will usually lead you to consider good moves.

    Fifth--Play longer time controls. Having enough time to thouroughly examine a position and convince yourself that you have found the best move (often having your opponent show you how your thinking was wrong) will refine your chess reasoning more than seeing hasty moves go down in flames. And analyze your games afterward.

     Lastly, accept that even when you become a good player there will be setbacks. No one understands chess completely and plays perfectly all the time. In post-game analysis (classical otb) I've had masters, even IMs, ask "Why is chess so hard?" when we see something we both missed during the game. A game where you mount a fine attack only to see it beaten back by brilliant defense, and then manage to pull a draw out of what seemed a lost ending is more satisfying than getting an easy win when your opponent makes a gross blunder. Playing your best is its own reward and I hope you will persevere and get to do so.

First of all, you shouldn’t be too hard on yourself. Chess is extremely difficult to master. Your playing level is a sum of opening theory, pattern recognition, end-game skills, attention to detail, focus, preparation, tactical tricks, positional awareness, etc. This means you can win the opening phase but throw away the game later because you miss a mate in 1. But you can also win a losing position because your knowledge of pawn structures or tactics is better. This also means improving your play is not a linear process.

Every time you get better at some aspect of the game is good. But it takes a while for it to translate into more winnings. As an example, let’s say you face a tricky opening like the fried liver attack and get crushed (we’ve all been there). So, you spend some time studying various lines and responses and you are now better prepared for the next time. You are a slightly better player now, yet you won’t see a jump in your rating, since it will take maybe 20 to 100 games before you face it again. Considering how many games you have played on this site, you are still on your first play through. You face every position for the first time. Every game you win, please consider that a big win. I suggest you play puzzles; they are designed to help you spot patterns that are applicable to actual games.

Your decision to start with improving openings is understandable. On your level studying openings is very difficult, because most resources assume opponent plays best moves are good moves. Since you will face a lot of random and bad moves, the possible positions is close to infinite. So my first suggestion is to focus on opening principles rather than opening theory for now.

Regarding the missed mate you posted. Do you know why you missed it? I mean, did you not see how it would lead to mate or did you not consider the move at all? Move 20, where you missed mate in 3, took you 30 seconds. One move later you did find the move. Good news, you can significantly improve your play by just taking time to go over all possible moves. On move 22, you had multiple mate threats. My suggestion is to take more time to think about positions like this next time, you had more than 20 minutes. I would gladly take 5-10 minutes in such a complex and dominating position. And for now, analyze the position, play around with the engine until understand it. Next opponent in this position won’t know what hit them.

Also, don’t throw in the towel. It is just about the most massively useful thing a chess player can carry. Any man who can rough it, slum it, struggle against terrible odds, win through, and still knows where his towel is, is clearly a man to be reckoned with.

I pretty much agree with all the advice given: particularly three things: a) opening principles rather than openings (if you're moving your queen on the third move, you need to learn principles more); b) at your level, most games are decided by who makes the fewest blunders; and c) slower time controls will surely reduce blunders.

One piece of advice I didn't see amongst the great posts in this thread are: do puzzles and learn "tactics" (the lessons here are good for such things).  Those will definitely help you see things like mates and other great moves.

Do it. I've played chess for 6 years, and now I've gotten better than I could have ever hoped to get (2400 strength level) But I kind of regret all the time I spent playing now. I wish I had put my time and energy into something more valuable. Still, I play a few games from time to time just for fun, but if I could go back, I would have never started playing.