Best Chess jokes?

Looking for some humor in the world of black and white (pieces)! :)

:)

I get the Republican, Marxist, and Desegregated Chess. 

I missed the point of the Atheist board. No bishops, hmmm??

Bishop=Religious leader in Catholicism

Could somebody explain the marxist one?

Marx was a communist. In communism, everyone recieves equal pay and everyone is equal. Therefore, all pieces are equal (as pawns) in marxist chess.

All pieces are equal. Regarding the quantity and ability, a classless society.

A man was walking in the park when he came upon another man playing chess with his dog. He declared, " Geez, that's a smart dog you have!" To which the dog owner replied, " Not really, I am ahead three games to one. 

Found this in an older forum:

A chess master died - after a few days, a friend of his heard a voice; it was him!
"What's it like, where you are now," he asked.
"What do you want to hear first, the good news or the bad news."
"Tell me the good news first." 
"Well, it's really heaven here. There are tournaments and blitz sessions going on all the time and Morphy, Alekhine, Lasker, Tal, Capablanca, Botvinnik, they're all here, and you can play them."
"Fantastic!" the friend said, "and what is the bad news?"
"You have Black against Capablanca on Saturday."

These are good ones, thanks :)

This is a great one.

lol

Loved it ! made me laugh.  Thanks for sharing

LOL

So, I had Garry Kasparov over for dinner last night. The problem was, we had a checkered tablecloth, and it took him two hours to pass the salt.

Thanks for the great jokes!

I often imagine this joke in my mind as if it might have actually  happened:

Dr. Emmanuel Lasker world chess champion was a good friend of Albert Einstein, who enjoyed a casual game of chess.  When Lasker played an informal game with the great scientist everyone wanted to know how good he plays.  Lasker replied, "He's good, but he's no Einstein!"

Why did the king make bad decisions?

He was always surrounded by chessmen.