Chess may be a war game in the sense that it's modeled after warfare, but this doesn't automatically give soldiers an advantage, does it? I think it's easy to understand that the game is generally won by the individual with a better understanding of the game and the ability to better channel their intelligence and concentration at the time the game is played.
Accordingly, it really doesn't bother me who beats me, male, female, child, adult, black, white or green. Now, what would really get to me is if there was a woman who I couldn't beat in an armwrestle. That's not a story I'd tell anyone.
well I would argue that chess is a war game, but I wouldn't go as far as immediately using that to claim this is why men must be better at the game.
On a sidenote .. Kasparov would have no doubt made a fine commando :)
Chess is abstract, but I think the assumption that it was intended as a simulation of (pre) medieval warfare is quite a reasonable one. Killing or mating seems to me a matter of semantics.