Q:Why should you never buy a house from a chess player?
A:Because they take ages to move.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
"I've created a chess program that mimics human play" said the computer programmer. "So it plays at GM level then?" asks the advising professor.
"No, but it does blame its loss on outside conditions!"
------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Russian friend of mine had been a prisoner in a Russian gulag back in 1972. He said all the prisoners were listening to the world championship match every day over a radio. One day when the match was all tied up the guards discovered the radio and took it from the prisoners so they could listen.
After about 2 weeks of not knowing what had happened in the Fischer Spassky match, a new prisoner arrived. Everyone immediately asked him what happened in the World Chess Championship Match and he said. " I lost."
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Q. What is the difference between a large cheese pizza and a chess Grandmaster?
A. A large cheese pizza can feed a family of four.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Two chess players are playing a correspondence game. White lives at the South Pole, and Black lives at the North Pole. The postal service is rather slow and play proceeds at the rate of one move per year. After 22 years of play, white makes a daring queen sacrifice, the consequences of which are by no means clear. A year later, as he sees the postman returning, he is very excited. He thinks "Will black take my queen ?", "Is the sacrifice sound ?".
He tears open the reply and sees "Jadoube".
Thx for an explanations, guys! I see, "chess nuts" and "chessnuts", two things confused.