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I know this is one of my bug bears but having now played 150 online games, it seems to me there our two extremes of player when it comes to courtesy and we all fall somewhere in-between - poilite and considerate and impolite and inconsiderate. I've encountered both extremes and (for me) enaging with real people playing chess and the mildest of acknowledgements is one of my motivations for playing.
I appreciate for some their English is poor and/or they are more intent to play chess than chat ... but it seems to me as a minimum we should acknowledge our opponent when we begin and thank (and/or congratulate) when we are through (just as one does in real life chess games). Other things like playing at a decent rate also matter.
Folk who don't do these basics may as well play the computer!
I think you need to deal with the fact that some people would like to feel they are engaging with humans rather than machines and then etiquette is a factor.
I do agree though that some folk are content just with the chess while others like me want my cake and eat it i.e. good, competitive chess and courteous social interaction. Chess.com does well to cater for both types!
These days I tend to play more team games than open invites as this tends to more likely satisfy that need. When I do accept open challenges I tend to check out the persons profile (crude I know) and try to guage the type of person I will be up against.
Having said that, I played people of all types and from all over the world and it has been a fantastic experience.
It's always nice to get or give a simple gg (good game) at the end of the on-line games 3 days/move etc). The old rule, if you can't say anything nice say nothing is always one to remember.
It is good to always thank your opponent (regardless whether the game is won or lost) in both OTB and online. After all, chess is a medium for social interaction. It is a game designed to be played with another person.
otb sometimes seems like it's moving too fast, but I agree with you Hankas - if you can say thanks for the game you should. Here's to a friendly world at least around this site!
It would be great if everyone - or even a larger majority - were good sports and courteous members. But it only takes a few jerks to make the experience less pleasant for many people.
Unfortunately, that is the world we live in now, especially online but not just with internet anonymity. When I was coming of adulthood, no sportsman would have thought of showing up another player at the pro or college levels. It just wasn't done.
As old Coach Royall told his teams when he would forbid end zone celebrations, "When you score, act like you've been there before."
But nowadays it is all "in your face" stuff. And the old methods of enforcing discipline are all strictly out of fashion today.
When pitcher Charlie Root denied the story of Babe Ruth "calling his shot" before his World Series home run, a writer asked how he could be so sure it didn't happen. "Because if he did," Root answered, "He would have been on his a**."
thats exactly wot I did 5 minutes ago in a game I just started
and something along those lines in the other games I played - some respond, some dont. wot caused you to stop wot seems to me a g8 idea?
I try to say gg at the beginning of the game and then see what happens from then on.
that's my approach too - obviously I need to respect folk who don't want to engage but have to say I have had some amazing, enriching conversations. Beats facebook or twitter becoz we are also playing this wonderful game at the same time