You're handicapping yourself through your misunderstandings. No good chessplayer got that way by memorizing opening lines twenty moves deep.
Good chessplayers memorize patterns, learn how pawn structures and piece activity relate to each other. They acquire favorite lines through repetition of hundreds and hundreds of games. They recognize where a line is heading, and learn how to head it off if it is tending toward a direction they do not favor.
Good correspondance players (make note of the adjective modifier, please) play the moves of the masters, but they choose the moves based on a knowledge of where the move is likely to lead the pieces and the pawns. Then they choose the move that will hopefully take them to a middlegame that has the characteristics of a game within which they feel comfortable.
When you get really good, you will choose moves that lead to a middlegame that you believe will lead to an endgame that you can win. And as you develop a feel for the openings that lead to these places, by dutifully studying the lessons of the masters while you play the games, this knowledge will help you feel comfortable and confident when you sit down to a chessboard and it's just you and the player on the other side of the board.
I have a diferent point of view, I think you have handicaped yourself, I think by using database on the opening my score would easily pick up at least some 400 points on my rating, (I see your score is 200 points over your 960 score), so there is a substancial advantage on it, regardless of how much you insist it is not. The problem is the day I have not the database, for example an OTB tournament, what would I do that day?
About your statement of not good chessplayer memorize opening lines... how do you know that?
The deal is very simple, you are in a tournament have 1 hour in your clock, you can rater spend the first 20 or 30 minutes of it trying to understand the opening and think each one of your moves, or you can play an opening that you have previusly "prepare" (this means memorize on several diferent variations), this will take you trough the first 15 moves of the game in 1 or 2 minutes of your time.
I think our diference is that we both have diferent targets and so we are training in diferent ways with diferent priorities.
Anyway, how do you memorize patterns?
I think that I use a modicum of understanding of opening theory when I when I choose a move from the database, and understanding of my own [chess] game.