Rubbing it in someone's face.

So I was playing a correspondence game where my oponent just wouldn't resign. I'm not complaining, really, I like having a relaxing game where I can do what I want with no risk but stalemate.

There's no real point to this thread, but the game is a bit of fun :)

Two boys were skinny dipping and the one couldn't help noticing the

size of the other's manhood, so he asked "How did ya get it that big?"

The other boy responded, "Well, I rub it down every night with lard."

Two weeks later they were back at the swimming hole. Once again there

was a comparison made with no results.

The first boy said, "I did what ya told me. Every night I have rubbed

it down with Crisco."

The other boy exclaimed, "Well, no wonder, ...  that's shortening."

;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-) ;-)

Umm... What.

Yes the d5 square is weak, but he's really clamping down on d4.  Usually if you don't know an opening knights before bishops is the best policy, so it is probably true here too.

Normally I'd recommend to prepare blasting through with a well timed d4 break.  However, this game shows it doesn't work too well in practice:

They agreed to a draw but Stockfish says black is doing better due to black's active knights and white's knight blocking the bishop in a now open position.  After 9...Nxd8 10.Nd4,Ndc6 11.Bb5,Bxc5 12.a3,Bxd4 13.axb4,0-0 14.0-0 black is slightly better. 

Back to your game:

You can prepare a d4 break as early as 5.e3,Nf6 6.d4!

Love the analysis, thanks!