I suppose I'll elaborate.
In an open game, I can turn a neat trick with offensive tactics every now and then, stealing away a major piece and then trading down to a favorable end game.
But, if I'm equal in material in a closed game, I can't figure out how to win.
I'm a strong enough player to beat it once in a blue moon on Level 12 (the highest level) with the black pieces, but I'm a weak enough player to draw with it once in a blue moon on Level 1 (the lowest level) with the white pieces.
Is this normal for an amateur?