"Man With No Name"

Someone said "How did the bishop end up at d8?!"

By the same teleport they share with the Queen on h8.

T   E   L   E   P   O   R   T

White 2 move and WIN

A tribute to my friend the late Michael Ramli

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"A small editing is done to the original version above as the pawn on a6 is now moved forward to a5" as of 12-11-21

So white makes 2 moves in a row and wins?

Help, I'm teleported !!! How do I get out of here ????? Beam down ????

If we can use the same logic that created this board set up in the first place, then I just teleport the opposing king into my jail.

  Ahhh, Master what did you do? Of course what an honor but first look at this to gile up your spirit. Teleport to Oxana

I usually challenge the great minds with taunts that will trigger their inner lions to solve the riddles at hand, because nowadays we, the people, are used to sleeping a lot. But the lion is always ready to be summoned even when people are sleepy. And lions solve more puzzles than humans do! But I did not expect to summon the Master himself, ohh...who am I kidding... 
Anyways... here is the way out off this messy maze:

"Although very gloomy there must be a way out of this madness: I have been banging my head into the wall to make this a legit-one. But I fail to get the same effect the legitimate way. Isn't that the reason people become criminals? Because they fail to do things the legitimate way.  Let's make correctional center out of this puzzle."

I hope this has been helpful. 

I must however add that I do not envy your position Master. If you recall I even compared you to Julius Caesar during the battle of Alesia, now none wants to be Brutus of the tail but being brutish sometimes... well very very rarely... can happen to all of us.  

Now good luck coming out of this but I am cheering you on, if any one here can it must be you. 

Chess is not logic my friend, it is more like a flower within a thorn , and a thorn within a rose, and so on ... that's how it goes or grows!

Truly you have a dizzying intellect.

Dizziness we can use, never trust the intellectuals, they will just sell you items you never need or are going to use any time soon. Never...  

Chess is not logic, just like a castle is not a stone.  But you cannot have a castle without stones.

Also, post number 47 here:

https://www.chess.com/forum/view/general/chess-is-not-a-sport-or-a-game?quote_id=64806943&page=3#comment_box

yall are so boring

We can't all be dragon hunting cliff divers like you.

On a normal day, on a normal chess board there are 4 castles and none are made of stones. Heck you could make 16 more, along a game, of course without castling privileges, yet none of them is made of stones, neither are the ones used on "Shawshank Redemption" just ask Emption... or Red, the first part of Red-emption, that deity-dude. Neither are the Twisted Sisters on the movie set or that Highlander-movie-scary-dude who cripples one of them. This is a world of make-believes. Scientists will say, that, at the time of big-bang, the wind you pass and the brain-mass of the same scientists all came from the same little space, if that, if that. 

Now where is the logic of all that, my friend. And why chess should be any different than that? I mean... chess-make-believes, even thinner... much thinner...

But there are concrete's of this world, and that is the world of rules. Those are made of stones. And the mind's of the people who goes by that. They are called reactionaries. Those are the people who do not like change, and try to linger on to the same ideas for ages, but for their horror they'll find out that time is more like fluids rather than stones. And suddenly a rude-awakening ... and the tumbling stones comes crashing down! & the castle's gone!

Along with those marbles you misplaced, yes we understand. 

King to f4?

Yes, why not, let's commit suicide!

And what happens when black plays (1.   - Bh5!!) right after that?

Taking this thread seriously is intellectual suicide

Yes, set him straight!

I did but you quoted the wrong post.  Post #17. 

Actually there is a very nice chess-delicacy somewhere there, but that is buried deep deep inside that monstrous thing. Dig it up and there is lunch.