I'm a tour-guide on Mars. Due to the lack of tourists on Mars, I moved to America to grab-up all the wonderful "free stuff" from the socialists. Unfortunately, Trump then became President - - - a man who mistakenly thinks that progressives like me want a "job"! A job!! Oh, brother. What's a "globalist" like me supposed to do to keep up my free ride? You know - - - distracting others with lies, half- baked innuendo - - - and so easily living off of those simple-minded fools (like my father and grandfather) that have always worked while "clinging to their bibles and guns". Those bigots! Those racists! Well, you know who they are - - - those dummies - - - you see my dilemma. I guess I'll eventually be forced to move on to Jupiter with Whoopie. Boy! It just seems to be getting harder and harder for us holier-than-thou con-artists to bilk the zombielike gullible multitude. Why, it's almost like - - - work!