My master made a chess playing chicken. When he couldn't beat the chicken at chess he broke it's neck and fed it to me. It was delicious!
After eating the delicious chess chicken I, too, was able to play chess.
I decided against playing my master.
Update: Too many cheaters on this site. One of the personal failings of dogs is that they can not abide cheating. Goodbye, chess.com, I will have to scratch my chess itch with real people who, if they must cheat, will have to switch pieces when my head is turned.