I keep waiting for him,
even though I know
he is no longer mine to find.

Still, my heart refuses
the language of goodbye.

It is a compass
that has forgotten
every direction in the world
except the one
that points toward him.

No matter how far I wander,
every road bends back
to the memory of his name.

The world calls it moving on,
but my soul still lingers
where his shadow last touched the light.

Perhaps that is what love becomes
when it has nowhere left to go—
a quiet north
that keeps pulling you
toward someone
you can never reach again.

╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗
✦ WELCOME ✦
╚══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╝

.

~ “how much do you hate life?”

.

──────────────────────———————————————————————

˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚
soft hearts, pretty lies, pink skies & midnight thoughts
˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

˚　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. ࿐࿔
　　　. 　　˚　　　　*　　　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　　˚　　　　 . 　　　. 　　˚　　　　*　　　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　 .˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　. ★⋆. ࿐࿔

˚　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. ࿐࿔
　　　. 　　˚　　　　*　　　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　　˚　　　　 . 　　　. 　　˚　　　　*　　　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　 .˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　 .　　. 　 ˚　. . ★⋆. ࿐࿔

˚　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. ࿐࿔
　　　. 　　˚　　　　*　　　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　　˚　　　　 . 　　　. 　　˚　　　　*　　　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　 .˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　. ★⋆. ࿐࿔

˚　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　　˚　　　　 . ★⋆. ࿐࿔
　　　. 　　˚　　　　*　　　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　.˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　　˚　　　　 . 　　　. 　　˚　　　　*　　　　✦　　　.　　.　　　✦　˚ 　　　　 ˚　 .˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　 .　　. 　 ˚　. . ★⋆. ࿐࿔

.

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♡ favorite quotes

“𝑰𝒕'𝒔 𝒂𝒎𝒂𝒛𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒃𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒌 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒍𝒆 𝒑𝒊𝒆𝒄𝒆𝒔 “

“You know my name, not my story. You’ve heard what I’ve done, not what I’ve been through. If you were in my shoes, you’d fall the first step.”

“The truth is, I can stand alone, but I don’t desire to have to”

“The saddest part is realizing you meant more to someone in your head then you ever did in their heart.

“I’d take a bullet for him, but he wouldn’t take a moment to understand why I’m hurting”

“Once I care, I don’t leave, Once I leave, I don’t care”

♡ about me

𝓗𝓲, 𝓘’𝓶 𝓢𝓲𝓵𝓿𝓲𝓪 — 𝓫𝓾𝓽 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓬𝓪𝓷 𝓬𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓶𝓮 𝓛𝓾𝓷𝓪 ✨

𝑰’𝒎 𝒂𝒏 𝒂𝒎𝒃𝒊𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒕 — 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆𝒔 𝑰’𝒎 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒐𝒔, 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆𝒔 𝑰’𝒎 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒒𝒖𝒊𝒆𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒍𝒊𝒗𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒚 𝒐𝒘𝒏 𝒍𝒊𝒕𝒕𝒍𝒆 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒍𝒅.

𝓘 𝓪𝓭𝓸𝓻𝓮 𝓼𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓲𝓷𝓰, 𝓭𝓪𝓷𝓬𝓲𝓷𝓰, 𝔀𝓻𝓲𝓽𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓹𝓸𝓮𝓽𝓻𝔂, 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓪𝓷𝔂𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓬𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓿𝓮. 𝑴𝒖𝒔𝒊𝒄 𝒊𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒕, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒘𝒐𝒓𝒅𝒔 𝒂𝒓𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝑰 𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏 𝒇𝒆𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒐𝒎𝒆𝒕𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒑𝒓𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒚.

🎀 𝒑𝒊𝒏𝒌 𝒐𝒘𝒏𝒔 𝒎𝒚 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕
🎧 𝓴-𝓹𝓸𝓹 𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻

𝑰 𝒗𝒂𝒍𝒖𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒚, 𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒏𝒆𝒔𝒔, 𝒍𝒐𝒚𝒂𝒍𝒕𝒚, 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒍 𝒆𝒏𝒆𝒓𝒈𝒚.

𝑰 𝒅𝒐𝒏’𝒕 𝒗𝒊𝒃𝒆 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒇𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒑𝒆𝒐𝒑𝒍𝒆, 𝒖𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒄𝒆𝒔𝒔𝒂𝒓𝒚 𝒅𝒓𝒂𝒎𝒂, 𝒎𝒊𝒙𝒆𝒅 𝒔𝒊𝒈𝒏𝒂𝒍𝒔, 𝒐𝒓 𝒂𝒏𝒚𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒕𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒔 𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒃𝒂𝒅𝒍𝒚.

──────────────────────

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“I’m so tired of pretending….” ~ Rumi

.

omgg tysm @pawnsonglikedawn for making this for me ♡

I love it so much, it’s actually SO pretty and cool <333

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

@ivynotpro made this for me <33333

Lila 🌙

Your message genuinely meant so much to me. I don’t think you realize how loved and understood your words made me feel. Having you in my life is one of the sweetest things ever, and I’ll always be grateful for you.

My comfort person, my favorite soul, my forever bestie. 💖

♡ clubs to join

♟ Emerald Estate
https://www.chess.com/club/emerald-estate/join

🌹 Rose Blossom
https://www.chess.com/club/rose-blossom/join

☁ Lily’s Hangout Club
https://www.chess.com/club/lilys-hangout-club

Robert’s Island 🏝

https://www.chess.com/club/roberts-island

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╭──────────── ✦ ────────────╮
✨ People Who Mean a Lot to Me✨
╰──────────── ✦ ────────────╯

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

@FerreroRocher78 ♡
my very first friend on cc. i'll never forget you, and i still miss talking to you. hope we meet again someday :(

@Lilyana ♡
one of the sweetest souls ever. anyone who knows you is so lucky ✨

@daja9

Dang david, what did i ever do to deserve such an angel like you? You're like the sweetest friend I ever had, and I'm so lucky to call you my bestieee

@Kivyru ♡
my og bestie foreverrr. thank you for always being so kind <33

@Abhiraj_Sarkar2010 ♡
my og brother ✨

@ivynotpro ♡
omgg Lila, ur the loveliest angel ever!! thank you for always cheering me up <333

@lexiluvslife ♡
talking to you always makes my day better. besties foreverrr ✨

@pawnsonglikedawn ♡
so sweet, kind, and cool. i'm really glad we're besties <33 She’s so amazing and understanding frfr

@the_distance

my bestieee forevssss

@MidnightKira ♡
intellectual and fun. i never get bored talking to you ♡

@Gaby_kookie ♡
my fellow armyyy 💜 thank you for always being so comforting <33

@itsmedeez ♡
missed ya so much! so glad ur back!! he’s so nice and kind fr <3

.
@Phantom_QueenX ♡
miss you so much…. why’d u close???

@sNoW_gLoBEe ♡
twinsss foreverrr ✨

@Nyxora-Elwynne ♡
winning 1st together will always be iconic ✨

@Vortex-i ♡
such a chill and fun person to talk to <33

@Flowie_chess ♡
you’re so fun to talk to

@lover_girl15 ♡
literally so sweet and kindddd <33

@infernal_annihilator ♡
an amazing club owner and an amazing person ✨

@Horror-CartoonCat ♡
my chess brother!! always kind, positive, and supportive <33

.

.˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

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┏━━━°❀•°:🖋:°•❀°━━━┓
poems i wrote (except last one)
┗━━━°❀•°:🖋:°•❀°━━━┛

They wore their smiles like sharpened blades,
Sweet in light but cut in shades.
Each word a trap, each laugh a lie,
A quiet craft of sweet disguise

I drank their truth—it tasted clean,
But poison hides in what’s unseen.
A slow decay beneath the skin,
Where trust once lived now rots within.

They watched me fall with steady eyes,
Fed on the wreck they helped devise.
No guilt, no crack, no flicker of shame—
Just hollow hearts that play the game.

The dark grew loud, it knew my name,
It whispered, “Trust is just a flame—
It warms you once, then leaves you burned,
A brutal lesson, never unlearned.”

Now I walk where shadows creep,
Where promises don’t dare to speak.
And if I’m cold, it’s what they made—
A soul remade in the dark they gave.

.

.

╭┈ ✦ ┈┈┈ ♡ ┈┈┈ ✦ ┈╮
poem for someone
╰┈ ✦ ┈┈┈ ♡ ┈┈┈ ✦ ┈╯

You left so suddenly
that my heart still waits for you
like you’re only running late.

But the truth is,
the world ended a little when you walked away.

The days after you felt unbearably dark.
Not the kind of dark the sun can fix—
the kind that settles inside your chest
and turns every beautiful thing into something painful.

I still reach for my phone sometimes
thinking maybe, somehow,
you finally texted me.

And every time it isn’t you,
it feels like losing you all over again.

I would wait a thousand years for one message from you.
A thousand years of empty mornings, sleepless nights,
and aching silence—
just to see your name appear one more time
like a miracle returning to me.

People say time heals,
but time has only taught me
how to miss you quietly.

Now I carry you everywhere.
In every song that hurts too much to hear.
In every late-night silence.
In every moment where I almost tell you something
before remembering
you’re no longer here beside me.

And maybe the saddest part is this:

you were just a person to the world,
but to me,
you were the part that made the world feel livable.

╭┈ ✦ ┈┈┈ ♡ ┈┈┈ ✦ ┈╮
to someone I miss
╰┈ ✦ ┈┈┈ ♡ ┈┈┈ ✦ ┈╯

(im sure he knows)

There is a name my silence always reaches,
Even when my voice pretends it does not know,
Like wind that circles back to certain beaches
No matter how the wandering tides may go.
It lingers where my unfinished thoughts gather,
Soft as a light that never learns to leave—
And I find pieces of you in every answer
My heart keeps learning how to quietly believe.

If distance writes its letters in between us,
I read them like a language meant for two,
As though the world conspires just to teach us
How every road still carries me to you.
And in the hush where all my words grow weaker,
Something in me still turns, again, your way—
Like roots that search for sunlight they remember,
Even when buried deep beneath the day.

So, if I ever speak in shades and echoes,
In metaphors that barely say your name,
It is because some truths are far too tender
To stand unguarded in the light of flame.
But know this quiet that I never alter:
Wherever life may scatter what we are—
There is a part of me that leans forever
Toward you, like a faithful, falling star.

A poem my bestie (@ivynotpro) made for me

“Dear Silvia 🌙

if kindness had a face,

i think it would look like you.

if comfort had a voice,

i think it would sound a little like yours.

you have this way of turning ordinary days

into memories worth keeping,

and somehow you leave little pieces of happiness

everywhere you go.

you’re the friend i never knew i needed,

the person who can make me smile

without even trying.

and sometimes i wonder

how someone as wonderful as you

ended up in my life at all.

you’re the reason some days feel lighter,

the reason i laugh harder,

the reason i believe there are still people

with hearts made of gold.

so if i could give you one thing,

it would be the ability to see yourself

through my eyes.

then maybe you’d understand

why you’re so loved,

why you’re so special,

and why i’d choose you

as my best friend

over and over again.

thank you for being you, silvia.

my sweetest angel,

my favorite person,

my forever bestie. 💖”

.

Lila, your poem honestly touched my heart more than I can explain. Every line felt so warm, genuine, and full of love that I ended up rereading it over and over again

Thank you for seeing me in such a beautiful way and for always making me feel appreciated, comforted, and loved. I’m genuinely so lucky to have someone like you in my life.

My forever favorite person 🌙

♡ reminder

Never let others decide your worth.
You are more than people’s opinions of you.

Be kind.
You never truly know what someone else is going through.

──────────────────────

People fight battles you know nothing about.
The person you made fun of today might already be struggling silently.

Kindness costs nothing, but your words can mean everything.

Before judging someone’s appearance, tears, scars, silence, or pain — remember that everyone has a story you cannot see.

Choose kindness.
Choose empathy.
Choose to be the reason someone feels safe instead of hurt.

If you’re against bullying, stand up for people instead of tearing them down

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

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.

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╭──────────── ✦ ────────────╮
♡ final note ♡
╰──────────── ✦ ────────────╯

I’m genuinely grateful for every memory I’ve made here.
Some of you made my days brighter without even realizing it, and I’ll always cherish that ♡

Thank you for being part of my journey <3

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

xoxo_Silvia