My Chess Poem

The native language of most Australians is English unless the op is an aboriginal.

ok?  is trakoz the OP's alter ego or something?  work on your reading comprehension

This one is for your correction please:

Ahh Chess, the Royal game

Who invented it? What’s his name?

It captured the hearts and minds of many affecionado’s

Sometimes you wonder where they get their bravado!

Young and old alike, beginners or masters quite the same

Everyone that has caught this bug becomes insane!

Time flies away so quickly on the board

There is not a moment you’d get bored

You won’t even notice that you haven’t had a meal

Boy oh boy, no wonder the world is spinning around

Your stomach is aching and your head is burning to the ground!

Thanks!

I realy like it.

nice

not bad for a 13 year old!

thanks

Chesshole, your comments WERE given constructively, nothing mean about them.  

Chess11kid, well done, good imagination and creativity.  Do me a favor... fix the "there" to "their".  :)      I'm not putting you down -- we ALL make mistakes.  I'm a writer who has had things published yet I still have a friend look over EVERY SINGLE THING that I write in seriousness including my dissertation - he knew nothing of the subject material but he could still check for spelling, grammatical and other typographical errors (and found plenty of them, believe me!)

WalangAlam -- I liked your poem as well!!  Since you asked for a correction, I'll give one -- I only took a very quick glance (in other words, I was reading for enjoyment and amusement, not to be critical) and the only thing that stuck out was an apostrophe that didn't belong.

It captured the hearts and minds of many affecionado’s

That's saying, "it captured the hearts and minds of many affecionado is".  

Otherwise, both poems were quite enjoyable, asmusing and entertaining.  I know SQUAT about poetry, I'm only saying what I like and I liked both.  Thank you both for sharing.   I actually feel honored that you did so as writing can be a very personal thing.  

Thank you.  

I'm a published poet (though it's been decades) and this is quite good!  Keep reading poetry (borrow books from your English-teacher dad), and the poetry you write will get even better.

Thankyou

I think affecionado`s might be an unusual spelling.

I had the gift, but I returned it to the store for a refund.

Silly wabbit.

Thanks guys for the feedback!

Grasp the brain washed pawn,

Forget the burning past,

Those mistakes are gone,

Develop your minor pieces fast.

The game requires precision,

A burning soul with a cold eye,

Mathematical vision,

Leave them asking why.

When the position folds,

When the decision is made,

Don't let the game leave you cold,

Force the other guy to fade.

i cant only write one stanzas ..you wrote a gazillion