How about responding to 1. Nf3 with Nc6, then, so that you've got e5 ready if c4 comes next. Nc6 is perfectly good, too, and you can play a Chigorin defense if White decides to go for a QG.
In my view, Nc6 is weak reply to Nf3 (Zuckertort, not yet Reti) because it gives White the choice of playing a king pawn or queen pawn opening (or even sticking with more of a Reti structure by delaying advance of both the d and e pawns). Also by blocking his c pawn, Black limits his options -- often to weaker openings for black. For example, if White plays e4 in response to Nc6, Black can no longer play Sicilian, and White can play into Ruy Lopez, which is quite strong for White. If White chooses to play d4, Black is similarly hampered by the knight blocking his c pawn, completely eliminating Slav, Semi-Slav and many other QGD black defenses. Indeed, White can force Black into the Chigorin, which is hardly Black's best response to a queen's gambit type opening.
Notably, Nc6 is rarely played at the GM level (certainly not in serious matches). I have seen it frequently played at lower levels (below 1000 or below 1200). I often play Nf3 in tournaments, and typically win against a Nc6 response (unless i make a terrible blunder like dropping a piece unnecessarily). Usually, the players who choose to play Nc6 against Nf3 admit to me afterwards that they have never actually played against a Nf3 opening previously and just made a guess as to what a good response would be.
2.Nf6
How do you get away with that provocative picture?
+1