The Jerome Gambit but 100% more dubious

Disclaimer: This post may lead to nausea, confusion, and extreme cases of disgust. Do not try this at home unless your playing bullet. 

So with that allow me to tell you the story of how this abomination of an opening was found.

The time: 3:30 AM, the day: Monday.  I was woken up in the middle of the night, nightmares about playing the Giuoco Pianissimo had engulfed me. I had given up playing dubious openings days ago but the desire to have one more Grob, one more Wayward Queen Attack, was too strong. Now, I was sitting straight up in bed. It felt as if the entire world was taunting me towards my small yet durable Dell chromebook. Soon, I had to give in. I jumped out of bed, the floorboards creaking in agony knowing what would happen next. I jumped into my chair and opened my chromebook, setting off a domino effect that would change history forever. The chess.com analysis board was waiting for me. Immediately, my brain's inner workings started turning. What opening I would make dubious. I thought and thought, and eventually came to the conclusion that Jerome would be my target. You can't an opening that already sacrifices 2 pieces even more dubious can you?            

So here we are. The self-named C- Variation of the Jerome Gambit. Named in honor of my math test(Why the heck do I need to know about  parabolas anyway?). For those unaware the Jerome Gambit starts after the moves:

 Analysis of taking the pawn: 

Bb6:

Now you may be wondering why I didn't do any analysis for any other lines that black can play. It's because they the other lines black can play are sub-par or in the case of 8. Bd4 are completely winning for black. I'm also too lazy to go that in-depth in this opening so yeah this is all your gonna get. 

Now you may be asking the question, "Why would anyone want to play this opening?"

And the answer is that no one should play this. It's not worth playing. It's complete garbage. 

Thank you for listening to my rant. 

Start of even more radical Z-variation :

what about the Bongcloud Attack?:

I present Vigor's countergambit on your BongCloud attack (the idea is to lure the white king on e3 !!) :

Ahh, I completely missed that, now my Bongcloud Attack is Refuted!!!

But I have spent 3 decades and came up with the following response:

I call it Jerome Gambit: Bongcloud, Yigor, King Attack

hi