I would conclude that I had channeled the spirit of Bobby Fischer and then Kasparov that. I would then listen to him fume and tell me that he was better than Bobby.
Beating Gary Kasparov
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spaz attack
ponnupazoozu wrote:
after saying "good game", i wld pretend he's the Garry Kasparov - and post the news on chess.com and spam everyone's email
"Gary" a perfectly acceptable transliteration here in America.
I'd call an ambulance to come take him to the emergency room, and I'd hope that they could still resuscitate him after he's been dead for 10 minutes or however long it took for me to win on time after his heart attack 
I'd come to chess.com and offer help too all teh nubz. Like myself.
id faint on the spot
i would say well done then offer to show him where he went wrong. its only fair to help these weaker players improve.
I would start training for my match against Carlsen.
i've beat him before...
stoneyshade wrote:
i've beat him before...
.... the breakdown.
I'd let him out of Pdela's basement.
I'd let him climb my stairway. Of course, I'd warn him about the numerous termites making it very shaky and unstable. I'd probably also use my newly earned pennies to get a cheap exterminator to come and get rid of some termites. Can't be careful enough when it comes to getting rid of these pests. I hope my staircase doesn't fall down. What were we talking about?
i'd finaly stop sweating from being so nervous and then look up to find out that kasparov fell asleep and lost on time then faint from the thought of a rematch
I'd tell him to change his ISP, as the reason he lost is 'cos he got cut off 10 seconds in during a 1 min bullet game.
These answers are all insane!
I would hope i'm not seriously, ie at a mental hosptial of some sort
Being drunk makes me say funny things. Only speak silly when drunk.
Practicing your craft already, good lad.