mentor needed

i love chess - ive had no formal training and could use some pointers from a real person - ive tried reading books and various articles but it all seems gibberish - but i figured if someone wanted to repeatedly kick my butt while explaining stuff to me i just might learn somthing - so whadya say

I will tell you that the best way to get a clear understanding and quick improvement to you game would be to use the tactics trainer here at chess.com. I had a grandmaster tell me that when I study chess and learn what my mistakes are  that is when I improve, however when I get study from other players I only learn their mistakes and will not improve. I use the tactics trainer at least 10 hours a week. Hope this helps.

Try annotating GM games.  It really helps

Yeah, if you want you can challenge me to a 14 day unrated game and I can give you some pointers.

i dunno if this helps any but when i first start out a game i like to take note of how the opposing player counters my move. then once i get a better understanding of my opponent, i try to invision two or three moves ahead and capitalize on my opponents mistakes.