Chess is mentally painful. Am I the only one?

I suspect that this is just the way it is always going to be for me: wanting to play a game that always brings me abject misery.  It's a very odd and contradictory pairing of reactions.

You’re literally encouraging a minor to drink, party, hook up with men, and look at questionable adult content. Are you serious?

I blocked and reported him.  Don't know if that means only that i don't see his stuff or if he's unable to post on my threads.

Both.

Thank you  It means he cannot post on your thread -- now we can go back to discussing the actual topic. In which case my answer is both yes and no. Some days it is, and I cannot seem to find any creative ideas in my games, but more often than not it isn't. Try playing more variants -- it helps

If it helps, I'm going to delete the "off-topic" notes from the argument on this thread. I apologize (for myself and on the behalf of @coffeeand420 -- since he he cant respond, and probably doesnt feel obligated to) for cluttering up this forum with our "debate" on whether chess is beneficial or not -- hope it helps.

Good. He's a known troll. I've reported him before for making overtly very racist comments - which I was surprised he wasn't banned for, tbh. 

The problem with individual folks banning people though is it leaves the offender free to continue without being checked up on.  I can only flag him once, for instance.

So what reasons for victory do you expect?

Or the other did not cheat from using another computerized chess board to make moves for him or her...Be gratefull it was an honest victory...Mind vs.mind....

go outside throw a football

go outside throw a football

Football?

There seems to be some confusion with some of these comments.

I am not seeking life advice.  I was just commenting on the effect that chess, and only chess, seems to have on me.

If losses affect you that bad, maybe you should study chess so you could win more (temporarily). There are hundreds of books for your level.

No matter what my level is, I'll only learn by playing others at my level; the losing (which isn't it anyway) would continue in that case at the same rate.  It's also not about "losing" per se.  It's the playing of the game.  Chess is odd: the playing is brutal.  And if I was winning, there would be endless stress about F'ing it up with no reward in the end (see my prior comments).  Johnny-Vang (possibly with humor) said it perfectly with "chess is a total head wrecker".  At least it is for me.

Therefore I don't think chess is for me.  After 50 years of being drawn to it, and experiencing the same angst regardless of being drawn to it, I'm clearly unfit for it.

I'll go remove my account now if possible, but in any case, thanks all.

Why not go inactive for now ,take some time away to relax & reflect & see if you feel the same way about it after a month?

Welcome to the club!! Chess is a very hard game, that is why I love it so much

I agree with you.  Chess delves into a part of my mind which is distinct from any other activities.  Right after I play a few chess games, I am very disconnected from the rest of the world and am like a completely different person.  My wife hated that before we got married, and now just comments that I've been playing chess.  For others, it may be "Have you been drinking?". For me, it is "Have you been chessing?"

Also, I am drawn to chess (like others may be to icecream) when I am overly stressed.  It does not destress me, but quite the opposite.  But at least, it detaches my mind from whatever was bothering me.

This used to bother me a lot and I stepped away from the game entirely for a couple of years.  I am a mathematician and I don't feel the same way when working on math problems.  There is certainly something unique about chess, at least to my mind.  I also play Go, but it does not have the same effect on me.  Maybe the difference is that I believe that there is the best move for chess in each position, but I don't believe that for Go.  So maybe for the game of chess, I am blaming myself for mistakes every single move.

Have you tried using a small dosage of thc to destress any situation you are in?

When i started to play online a very long time ago i was probably around 1000 and it was really painfull because i didn't know a lot and i was loosing 2 out of 3 games.

After a few months of playing daily a lot i got around 1250 and only then did i start to enjoy playing....i was loosing maybe 50% of the time but i had a lot more fun because my opponents were not crushing me most of the time...and i was still learning by watching woman gm playing at ICC...

I did quit playing after a few months when i was around 1350 because i was not improving at that point.

If you have no fun quit for a while.....you should feel a lot better when you come back.....or do tacticals problems if you enjoy them,they should make you better and more confident right away....