@HappyFunDeath, @btickler is right. I can't just flip a switch and be happy. Depression is a disease and you can't just flip a switch and cure a disease
Considering Giving Up On Chess
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At the end of the day, chess is just a game. If you do not find joy in the game anymore, it may be time to move on.
Who's to say you won't come back after a few years and enjoy it again.
Be safe and happy, my guy!
nklristic wrote:
Why not play and study if you enjoy it, and whatever happens - happens? ...
So if you enjoy chess and have some time for it, play, study, do what you like, and prosper... If not for anything else, it might make you happier. Good luck.
This is the best possible advice. Far too many people here are driving themselves crazy with the obsession to "improve" as quickly as possible. You don't have to become a GM to enjoy chess. You don't have to have a rating of 2000 or 1000 or even 800. It is perfectly fine to study the game simply because it is such a beautiful game.
Immersing yourself in the great chess games of the past can be a very effective way to relieve depression.
PUZZLE RUSH IS YOUR BEST FRIEND!!! NEVER GIVE UP!!! NEVER!!!
Hey, I saw a Magnus Carlsen interview where he talks about how he has an awful memory and no particular visualization skills; it's worth looking up on Youtube. I wouldn't sweat that part, just have fun 
Dec 29, 2020
0
#48
UppityEelChesskid wrote:
I'm 11 years old, and I've been playing chess since age 8. I was diagnosed with Clinical Depression in September. In some rare cases, depression can cause one to lose the ability to visualize. This runs in my family. The phenomenon of not being able to visualize is called aphantasia. I've been doing some research on aphantasia cures and I've been trying for months, yet nothing is working. I've also been doing some research on visualization in chess and I came across this excerpt from an article by GM Simon Williams.
I'm currently 904 USCF, and I don't know if I'm capable of progression. A lot of other sources say that visualization is crucial in chess. Can I progress? If so, how?
Youre al over the place. Playing speed chess, playing variants, and moving fast. None of this is going to improve your game.
If you are serious about improvement? Which experience here has taught me that 99.99999% of the people that ask this question are not serious about getting better. But...in that off chance you are serious.
1. Stop playing speed chess. It instills bad habits.
2. Stop playing variants. You need to FOCUS and CONCENTRATE on chess.
3. Play slow time controls like daily chess.
4. Use a real board and pieces when playing and doing tactics.
5. Use pen and paper to keep track of your notes, thoughts, ideas, plans, etc.
6. Do your own analysis, and get someone stronger to go over your games/analysis.
Dec 29, 2020
0
#49
bourbonguy1 wrote:
Great advice Bacon. I like something you said on another thread, I can’t recall exactly which one, regarding tactics. Someone recommended to keep doing a lot of tactics sand you commented it would be better to do just a few tactics and try to memorize the patterns. That makes a lot of sense. I’m still struggling but I am seeing signs, however small, of improvement. My problem is that while I am beginning to make some better moves when I do blunder it is at a pivotal point that precipitates a downward spiral.
Someone posted: "Do a lot, or hundreds of tactics" I dont remember which. My reply was that doing 3 a day and learning and understanding the motif, pattern, and how the tactic came about is much more beneficial, than speeding through hundreds of tactics and not understanding what you just did.
As for what you posted. Accept the fact that no matter how good you get at this game, you will always blunder. It just wont be as often or as bad :-)
Dec 29, 2020
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#50
bourbonguy1 wrote:
Thats the post I was referencing and I agree that it’s better to fully understand the how and why of a pattern and it’s motif than to just practice moving pieces. As for getting better or getting just not as bad I’m reminded of an old story I was heard about an older man that all his life never learned to swim. One day he decided he was going to learn, so he went to the local pool a few times a week to take lessons and practice. One day several months later a friend of his asked him “did you finally learn to swim”. The old man replied no, but I did learn to drown more slowly.
Over the weekend someone posted there 2021 goals. Part of there goals were to read 14 chess books in a year. Now...if they are just going to read them? Then that is very doable. Now...if they are going to actually study them? No way that it will happen. To properly study a chess book can take months at a minimum.
Exactly! Swimming is not a sport. It is what you do to keep from drowning.
Dec 29, 2020
0
#51
UppityEelChesskid wrote:
I'm 11 years old, and I've been playing chess since age 8. I was diagnosed with Clinical Depression in September. In some rare cases, depression can cause one to lose the ability to visualize. This runs in my family. The phenomenon of not being able to visualize is called aphantasia. I've been doing some research on aphantasia cures and I've been trying for months, yet nothing is working. I've also been doing some research on visualization in chess and I came across this excerpt from an article by GM Simon Williams.
I'm currently 904 USCF, and I don't know if I'm capable of progression. A lot of other sources say that visualization is crucial in chess. Can I progress? If so, how?
I can't visualize at all.
If I close my eyes and try to imagine the chessboard or a position, I see nothing but the darkness inside my eyelids.
Still, I've managed to reach 2200+ on various online platforms. And I've beaten various titled players over the board, throughout the years. I don't say this to brag, but rather: to encourage you. If I can do it, with no visualization ability, so can you.
In my opinion, the ability to "visualize" isn't necessary at all to play good chess.
I'm so sorry about that, if you really don't like it, don't play it. Chess is for fun, not for rating.
I sincerely hope you get better soon.
Dec 29, 2020
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#53
Whatever doctor diagnosed an 11 year old with clinical depression should be shot.
Dec 29, 2020
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#54
Steven-ODonoghue wrote:
Whatever doctor diagnosed an 11 year old with clinical depression should be shot.
While rare it is possible.
Dec 29, 2020
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#55
it is possible. i've been hating on myself and i've been severely suicidal for a while.
Dec 29, 2020
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#56
UppityEelChesskid wrote:
it is possible. i've been hating on myself and i've been severely suicidal for a while.
Then you shouldn't be online, and you shouldn't be here.
Dec 29, 2020
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#58
UppityEelChesskid wrote:
wdym
A child with emotional/mental issues should not be left unsupervised online.
Dec 29, 2020
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#59
A child with emotional/mental issues should be taken away from their parents.
I think some of you are misunderstanding, I wasn't depressed at 8, I developed depression this September, and aphantasia a little later