Forums

Chuck Norris vs Magnus Carlsen

Sort:
Useless_Eustace

I'm fixin to drop an apple on his noodle.

Chessgrandmaster2001

lol

nameno1had

Chuck kicks Magnus'ass, even at their ages...

Useless_Eustace

welhel boys

macer75
Ziryab wrote:

I thought that religion was banned from these forums? Clearly Chuckie Norris is a g-d.

THIS THREAD MUST BE LOCKED 

That would be even more funny if someone who didn't know who Chuck Norris is, and just heard of Chuck Norris by reading through this thread made that comment.

DumbLove

Chess.com invented a new function. "Chuck Norris wins by default."

Chessgrandmaster2001

lol

Ziryab
macer75 wrote:
Ziryab wrote:

I thought that religion was banned from these forums? Clearly Chuckie Norris is a g-d.

THIS THREAD MUST BE LOCKED 

That would be even more funny if someone who didn't know who Chuck Norris is, and just heard of Chuck Norris by reading through this thread made that comment.

What I know of Chuck Norris comes from this thread, others like this thread, one episode of Walker, Texas Ranger, and general knowledge of his notorious delusions in scientific and political matters (the dude is a nut). I'm fairly certain that he doesn't know how the horsey moves.

DefinitelyNotGM

Chuck Norris once won a game of chess in one move: a roundhouse kick to the head.

BigDoggProblem

Chuck Norris is 1/8th Indian, but not by ancestry. He actually ate an Indian.

varelse1

Once during a simul, Chuck Norris actually mated the entire Dallas Cowboy Cheerleading squad.

And then they played chess.

Chessgrandmaster2001

lol

Useless_Eustace

my pa usta tell me dont never bleeve that sayins bout it aint the size of the dawg n the fight. try spouting off your beard ta hillbilly jim. heel nock ya nto next week. 

varelse1

The smartest combination Tal ever played he played against Chuck Norris.

He sacrificed his king.

nameno1had

I once saw Chuck Norris defeat a 3 legged man in an ass kickin contest and he only used his bare hands...I wouldn't dare play him in chess...

Useless_Eustace

my pa gawd bless wooda barnukled with ol mr norris backn the day an thats a fact. he war big as a outhouse. jus think maybe they wooda settleder with a good ol fingerbender and kep the blood n em.

Chessgrandmaster2001
varelse1 wrote:

The smartest combination Tal ever played he played against Chuck Norris.

He sacrificed his king.

o.O

varelse1

nameno1had wrote:

I once saw Chuck Norris defeat a 3 legged man in an ass kickin contest and he only used his bare hands...I wouldn't dare play him in chess...

.

.Chuck Norris can run a 3 legged race solo.

.

nameno1had

I once saw a chess player attempt to mate Chuck Norris with a bishop. Instead of moving the piece to the square when the player reached for it, he promptly began to bow and pray for foregiveness, for even considering going to do it and the bishop became animate and kicked the guy in the ass. It then bowed in a salute to Chuck. Mr Norris won on time that game...

Chessgrandmaster2001

...